20 Habits of Successful & Wealthy Traders!

Hello to all my readers :)

Hope my post finds you well and dandy! :)

Have you ever asked yourself the following questions:

What differentiates a successful trader from an unsuccessful one?

What are the habits of successful people and in particular successful traders?

trading success

I have often asked myself these questions as I have trained and coached a large numbers of traders as I came across a lot of different trader types and I could clearly see that there is a pattern and habits which successful traders follow :).

Traders types

For novice FX traders, and experts too, what can we learn from those who are successful?

To find out, I started to interview professional and well known traders as well as less famous ones who are successful at trading to figure out what made them different and successful. After hundred of interviews, I have collated what are the reoccurring themes of successful and wealthy traders :).

Successful Traders

Below, I have listed the 20 habits of successful and wealthy traders and if you are a seasoned trader, I am sure you will agree with them.

1. Have a precise Trading Plan and follow it with discipline

2. Patient with winners and impatient with losers

3. View Technical Analysis as a picture of where traders are lining up to buy and sell

4. Before they enter every trade they will know profit target and stop exit

5. Approach trade no.5 with the same conviction as the previous 4 losing trades

6. Use naked charts (Price Action)

7. Read about human and Trading Psychology

8. Successful traders stopped trying to pick tops and bottoms long ago

9. Do not think market as expensive or cheap

10. Aggressive with trade size when doing well and modest when not

11. Realise the market will be open tomorrow so don’t chase trades

12. Never add to a losing position. EVER.

13. Judge their trading success on anything but money

14. Comfortable making decisions with incomplete information

15. Making money is more important than being right

16. Practice reading the right side of the charts not the left

17. Have an edge in the market which gives them a greater than 50/50 chance of determining the future direction of the price

18. Determine position size based on risk, not round numbers

19. Buy strong market and sell weak markets

20. Play reaction, not the news

Analyse, trade, evaluate, repeat. Successful traders are creatures of habit – they are defined by their daily trading routines :).

Habit sweet spot

Sure, there is talent involved, but it is what they do everyday, over and over, through triumph and failure, that makes them successful :).

success day in day out

it is not about fortune. It is about skill, honed through persistence and discipline. They are dedicated to perfecting their craft :).

Trading Zone

We become what we repeatedly do‘ – Sean Covey.

aristotle

To your Successful Trading! :)

Viv :)

3 Rules for Trading Success!

A very warm evening to all my readers :)

Have you ever considered to become a financial market trader?

Have you ever experienced success when you first started to trade?

trading

You might know, that traders and active investors are a largely misperceived breed and their profession/discipline is also misunderstood. Trading, whether that of Forex, Futures, Stocks, Bonds or Options, is usually viewed as gambling by the public. It is seen as a way to get rick quick through fortune. But there is so much more to it than meets the eye.

Legitimate day traders, swing traders, and active investors are true masters of their craft, rising above human nature to churn out profits consistently from the market. Just like great artists, athletes, and professionals train years to become proficient, so do great traders, honing their skills of analysis, risk control, and mental discipline to gain an edge in the markets.

As any other discipline, to become successful in trading, there is the need to be discipline and to follow the rules. :)

disciplined_trading_cycle

Below I have listed three rules to follow to become a long-term successful trader. Only when you master them, you can see consistent results in your trading. :)

Rule 1:  Your desire to ‘win’ is the problem.

Male hand holding gold medal against the dramatic sky

They say that the worst thing in life is not death, but what dies within you while you are still alive. I strongly believe in this :)

Dreams are powerful things, and nothing is worse than when life makes them seem impossible to achieve.  In the words of a famous 1980’s song, dreams are like ‘china in your hand’ – they can break easily.

As trader, you might be familiar with this scenario: when first started out in trading, the stock market was your best friend.  Everything looked so easy: technology, advanced trading software and online brokerage accounts made trading seem like child’s play. And then the worst thing that could befall a new trader to start winning.

Then the markets began to reward you for trading without any discipline or proper planning.  Skimming the indices for a few points here and there – jumping in and jumping out like a trapeze artist, instead of risking 1% of your capital on each trade risk 20%, instead of honouring your stop-loss, you would start to move it as soon as you feared you might be losing.  As you started to win more and more trades, you began to over-leverage and over-trade your position.  And yes, the markets still rewarded you with money. Not surprisingly, your good fortune did not last for very long, within a few months you reduced your beautiful trading account to 30% of its original value.’  Does it sound familiar?

If you have experienced losses in your early days of trading, consider yourself very fortunate.  That should have taught you a very important lesson about risk – there are sharks and piranhas everywhere ready to take your money.  More importantly the market has no responsibility to make you money as it does not know your existence and the market never loses!

 

Summary:  Traders should focus on executing their trading plans and minimising their risks and NOT whether they will win or lose on any single trade.  Profits will come to you if you take care of the risk.

risk

Rule 2: Your worst enemy: You & your Perfectionism

cycle of perfectionism

Few things in life are ever perfect such as holding your newborn baby for the first time or the smile of the love of your life. :)

The desire to get things perfect and ‘just right’ may serve you well in other professions – but it is a curse when it comes to trading or starting any business.

I have seen many traders follow a pattern: they go from over-confident to over-cautious.  After a losing streak, they begin to question their system.  Now a trade has to ‘feel right’ to them before they take action and by the time the feeling comes it is much too late to enter. And then begins the next inevitable stage: the search for the magic pill – a foolproof and easy trading system that gets you in and out at exact tops and bottoms and you never lose.

People that spent time looking for such a ‘magic pill’ – it does not exist so please do not waste your time.  (I say this just in case you saw that movie ‘Limitless’ which coincidentally was about a guy who swallows a pill and becomes a stock market genius.  An excellent movie, but it’s not going to happen!)

Summary:  There are no shortcuts to success – only hard work and adhering to a proper trading plan.

champions-know-there-are-no-shortcuts-to-the-top

3: Trade to make a living, NOT to make a killing

trading 1

A question I often get asked in my coaching sessions is ‘Can I trade a £2,000 account to be able to quit my job?’  This is clearly not realistic.  Another favourite is:  ‘How do I turn £2,000 into £1 million in six months?’  Err… You’ve got to be kidding me!

There are companies out there who allow you to leverage your money through the medium of spread betting, CFDs or options.  You could use £2,000 to trade on 100:1 leverage and if you are fortunate ‘make a fortune’.  But that good fortune only has to turn into bad fortune once before you lose everything.  And just because you can do something does not mean you should do it.  You could drive a fast car at ridiculous speeds down a small country road – but you will only be a danger to yourself and everyone else.

Write this phrase down on a piece of paper and stick it on your computer so you never forget it:

Amateur traders focus on how much money they can MAKE, Professional traders focus on how much money they can LOSE. 

Summary: The sole reason you should trade is for the purpose of  becoming financially free to be able to cover all of your monthly expenses and luxuries.  The millions will come to you as a result of adhering to a solid trading plan with discipline.

freedom (1)

Remember that to the extent of  sticking to your trading plan and discipline, you will become a successful trader! :)

Trading+Discipline

To your Trading Success :)

Viv :)

 

 

The Wisdom of Failure

A very good evening to all my readers, :)

Have you ever asked yourself:

How do you climb back onto the saddle when the horse has flung you off: when your plans fall to pieces?

Looking back, as we approach another year end and tabulating whether my successes have been more than my failures. It is clear that failure has left its imprint.

Life will constantly test your resolve and level of commitment.

If only we could have patience in the midst of our trials. Coping with rejection and apparent failure is a serious matter.

plan vs reality

If you focus on positive thinking, even the harshest defeat is only a stepping-stone. :)

Never let Success get to your Head. Never let Failure get to your Heart. “I didn’t get consumed by losses,” said Don Shula, “and I didn’t get overwhelmed by successes.”

Many of us have stifled our life by heeding some misguided critic who implied we were not good enough. Few things in life are certain but failure is.

Failure seems as something to be avoided at all cost. Although it leaves a sour taste, we should embrace failure for the learning opportunity it is. Failure is the oldest teacher, and perhaps the wisest of them all. Some things are impossible to completely grasp without first falling down.

We live in a culture that values perfectionism and failure is often viewed as a sign of weakness. People become so fixated on not failing that they never move forward. When it comes to failing, our egos are our own worst enemies. It is easier to accept failure in private, but once the failure is obvious to everyone around you, it becomes harder to accept it. Holding onto failures for way too long is destructive.

What is the importance  of failure?

  • It’s a learning Experience. Failure drives us to change. It represents opportunity and growth. It gives new direction.There is always one or more lessons to learn in what you may see as a failure.
  • It builds Character. We learn how to behave when we finally accomplish our goals. The humility we gain through our failures allows us to better handle and appreciate success.
  • It makes you Stronger. It is with persistence we overcome failure to achieve success . When people fail, they feel unaccomplished, and so they try again and again, until they finally reach success.
  • Your chances of Succeeding Increases. Failures are the pillars for success. You gain experiences you could not get any other way. Some things can only be learned through trial and error.
  • Failure is a type of Freedom. You might ask: Why? Because the worst has happened. Now, you can relax and rebuild again.

Success does not come easy. Everyone must face one hurdle after another. If you think that once you have the success you crave, you can relax, you are sadly mistaken.

the finish line

Failure can be costly, not only emotionally but financially as well. Some industries are very unforgiving as one or more failures may instantly get you the boot. The worse thing anyone can do, is not learn from failures.

“Failure is the tuition you pay for success.” ~Walter Brunell

In recent years, more and more executives have embraced the point of view, that failure is a prerequisite to invention. ‘The fastest way to succeed’, IBM’s Thomas Watson, Sr., once said, ‘is to double your failure rate.’ The growing acceptance of failure is changing the way companies approach innovation.

‘There is no failure. Only feedback.’ ~Robert Allen

However, distinguishing between excusable and inexcusable failure is crucial. Managing failure is key. Some mistakes are unpardonable for example producing and marketing a dysfunctional product caused by poor quality control. Encouraging failure doesn’t mean abandoning or supervision or respect for sound practices. Managing for failure requires leaders to be more engaged, not less.

Finally, don’t let the fear of failure hold you back.

I wish you the very best in life and success :)and remember that ‘Our best success often come after our greatest disappointments.’ ~Henry Ward Beecher

Remember to take risks: if you win, you will be happy; if you lose, you will be wise. Always find joy in your journey for as George Bailey said it best “It’s a Wonderful Life!” :)

take risks if u win

I really appreciate that you are taking the time to read this post.

To your successes! :)

Viv :)

Trading in the zone!

 Have you have been so focused on doing something that you have not been aware of people walking around you or heard any surrounding noise?

Have you ever driven in a motorway and listen to your favourite music? Have you felt in tune with it?

I hope you agree with me that when you are in tune with something or someone, you are completely focused without any distractions or noticing any noise.

Most of you, who know me well, have already identified the subject of this article, and yes, you are not wrong. It’s about trading and in particular it is related to a famous trading book: Trading in the zone by Mark Douglas.

trading in the zone

I love this book because it is related to trading psychology and if you are a trader or you are thinking of taking up this career than this is an absolute must read for you. I have read it so many times that I have lost count. :-)

You will get the most from this book if you already have a trading system or execute the trades as effectively as you would like. :-)

This book taps into your belief systems, which in turn determine your actions, in a very coherent manner. ‘A belief system is nothing more than a thought you’ve though over and over again’ – Wayne Dyer. It is no exaggeration to say that if your trading methodology has a genuine edge, this book could transform you into the owner of your very own casino if you allow it to.

belief-system-2

The knowledge the author offers is also applicable to other areas of life including quitting smoking – it’s all about positively energising the concept that you’re a non smoker and de-energising the concept that you are a smoker.

Before you turn off condemning that comment as psycho-babble, you should remember, as the author explains, to keep your mind open to information according to what you already believe to be true.

An exceptionally fine book on the most important aspects of trading in which the author selflessly shares his soul in addition to his knowledge.

emotional guidance scale

For example, he shares the 5 fundamental truths of trading:

  1. Anything can happen whilst trading
  2. You do not need to know what is going to happen next in order to make money
  3. There is a random distribution between wins and losses for any given set of variables that define an edge
  4. An edge is nothing more than an indication of a higher probability of one thing happening over another
  5. Every moment in the market is unique

probability mindset

He also shares, the 7 principles of trading consistency:

  1. I objectively identify my edge
  2. I predefine the risk of every trade
  3. I completely accept the risk or I am willing to let go of the trade
  4. I act on my edges without hesitation or reservation
  5. I pay myself as the market makes money available to me
  6. I continually monitor my susceptibility to make errors
  7. I understand the absolute necessity of these principles of consistent success and therefore I will never violate them

consistency is key

So to think like a trader means to think in terms of probabilities, identify your edge, execute your trades the same way each and every time and take every setup that fits your criteria. Look to analyze your trades in sample sizes and not individually. Doing these things (over time), can help develop a level of confidence and consistency in your trading.

consistence creates confidence

He suggests an excellent Trading Mission Statement:

I am a determined trading athlete. My goal as an online trading athlete is to be confident and have belief.

Sticking tenaciously to my plan will help me become a full time trader, trading for a living.

Set and go!!!

Also, he outlines the importance of having a Trading Plan:

‘To have time to do what I want to do and still have the money to do it as well, e.g. travelling, etc.’

forex-trading-plan

To attain the best possible impact on your trading mindset, read with an open mind, make notes, re-read, and re-read again as the knowledge in the book contains has to sink deep into your personality and character arena.

success 2

Happy reading :-)

To your trading success :-)

Viv :-)

8 STEPS TO CHOOSE YOUR BEST STRATEGY!

A good evening to all my readers :-)

Hope my post finds you well and jolly :-)

 

‘Strategy is not the consequences of planning but rather the opposite, its starting point.’ – Henry Mitzberg

Have you ever wondered why things suddenly did not work out after setting things up in the right place to accomplish a goal?

 

Have you ever felt that you had the perfect edge to achieve your plan but something did not work out the way you wanted?

 

Most of the time this is because even if the situations, places, circumstances and opportunities are in our favour, we do not use the right tools and techniques to ensure our plans and goals manifest into reality. Would you agree with me? Also to be honest, it is not a pleasurable place to be, is it?

This post will provide you deep insight into the core and the most fundamental principle which all the tools and techniques for achieving success come from: STRATEGY!

strategy

The day I learnt that for any achievement in life and in business, there was always a more efficient way to achieve it by using a proven strategy, it really  opened up a new dimension in my life!  Before we examine strategies in more detail, let me give you the gift of one of the most profound success strategies I know. ‘Get around the path walkers.’ If you want to be successful you should model a successful person by having them coach and/or mentor you. :-) They have already achieved what you want to achieve and been through the bumps in the road, the highs and the lows of the process and therefore are in a better position than you to guide you to the most effective strategy to employ, and get you the success you deserve. Is this not want all of us want – to avoid the pitfalls and enjoy a smooth and successful ride?

Mentor-300x225

At this point, you might ask:

How can I recognize what is the best and most effective strategy to employ?

 

Firstly, we need to understand what a strategy is. It is the process, the system and method employed to achieve our goals. It is how we go about to accomplish our objectives. It is our starting point from which comes our plan of action. It enables decisions to be taken, plans to be judged, resources to be allocated and actions to be prioritised. It is what empowers people to develop action plans that are consistent with the future that is being sought and means they act decisively in the areas where most advantage can be won. This is where one final step is needed – producing our plan! Without it, we will not achieve any results! :-)

Below are the 8 steps that will help you to recognize which strategy will be best for achieving your success and you can visit my website www.thebooksonsuccess.com and download the PDF exercise called ‘Strategy Mastery Worksheet’ for a printer-friendly version. Please complete this exercise both for your business and for your personal life! This tool is a very effective aid in recognizing what ‘marketing strategies’ to add to your business plan and employ in your business.

9780957498501 

STEP 1: Understand the Scope of your goal/plan

 Submarine periscope

To identify and understand the scope of your goal/plan, ask yourself the following questions:

What is my BIG WHY? What is the purpose of my business?

What is my mission statement? What is my business mission statement?

What are my reasons to get up every morning? What reasons do I have for investing my time, energy and money in my business every day?

What message do I want to promote with my marketing campaign?

 

What makes me stand out in my industry?

 

What makes my services and products different from my competition?

In terms of business, not only does your mission statement guide your overall company practices, it also provides you with the guidelines and clarity to choose the best strategy. Before you can dive into the details, you need to envision the scope of your goal/plan: considering the advantages, challenges and purpose of it. 

Remember, PURPOSE and CLARITY are the most important keys to success when identifying the best strategy for achieving your goals/plans!

 

 

STEP 2: Perform your SWOT analysis

swot-analysis

 

Once you have a grasp of the scope of your big goal, run your desired goal through a SWOT analysis. You can visit my website www.thebooksonsuccess.com and download the PDF exercise called ‘SWOT Analysis’ for a printer-friendly version.

 

The outcome will be a high level of clarity on the necessary steps that will be needed to achieve your big goal, as well as the most effective ways of taking those necessary steps. :-)

 

 

STEP 3: Set small goals

small-goals

 

Once you have clarity on your purpose (your why) and have run your big goal through a SWOT analysis, then you can start to set smaller goals to achieve the steps identified that are needed if you are to achieve your big goal. You will now have the benefit of long term vision and short term motivation! This is the step when you start to turn future possibility into realistic probability.

 

 

STEP 4: Set deadlines

deadlines

Deadline is the time commitment by which your task/goal must be achieved. This is a powerful strategic tool we must use to our advantage. When we set a deadline and expect to get our goal accomplished quickly, they usually do! What are the reasons behind this? It usually takes as much time as we allow them to take! You see, we always work best under a self-determined or externally fixed deadline. By consciously choosing to enforce deadlines, they increase our accountability and focus, essentially fast tracking our results and rewards.

What are the benefits of having deadlines?

A deadline enforces a strong sense of urgency and challenges us to perform.

Deadlines represent commitment, this is a black and white choice: you are committed or you are not.

Deadlines enforce accountability and they create a sense of urgency to improve your results.

Your challenge is to meet each deadline set and astound yourself by what you are able to accomplish!

STEP 5: Establish measures of Success

to-measure-is-to-know-

Plans and goals are useless without clearly understood, quantifiable measures of success.

Understanding how success will be measured is one of the keys to achieving it as if we can’t measure it, we can’t manage it. As part of your strategy, decide what areas you hope to impact, then determine how it will be monitored. Set up your reporting plan early in the process of laying out your strategy. That way, you will be clear on the expectations from the outset.

Establish an implementation calendar, with specific milestones for each step, i.e. monthly or weekly targets. Assign clear accountability for each action, while making sure the needed resources are in place. Ensure that you know what action you need to take to make it happen, measure assiduously and take necessary procedures quickly if milestones are not met.

 

STEP 6: Develop a strategy Map and make it visual

strategy map

 

It is time to put it all together and have a clear and organised plan. I am sure that now you have more clarity on your purpose, weaknesses, strengths, opportunities, threats, long term goals, monthly SMART goals, a TO-DO list based on your short term goals and metrics to measure your success!

Now that you have put it all together and you have found out what is your best strategy to employ to achieve your goal/plan, it is time to create a tool that will help you know where you’re at in a single glance.

 To make it more powerful and successful, you’ll need to create a strategy Map.

 

 

STEP 7: Monitor your performance and results

monitoring performance

 

This is a very vital and important aspect to ensure that your strategy is working and producing results! Obviously, you need to put efforts and time into it, so it is essential that you have clear means to measure your results!

Remember to celebrate the wins along the way, whether big or small. It will help to boost your confidence levels and to drive your motivation to achieve the next elements of your goal/plan:-)

 

 

STEP 8: Review your strategy and Implement it

strategy lifecycle 

This is the most important step to make your strategy the most effective and efficient possible. A good strategy guides your goals/plans and encourages new opportunities for growth.

However, too often strategic thinking boils down to merely validating the current strategy or making go/no go decisions on the course of action. A much better approach is to spend creative time up front to identify several alternatives – the so called ‘what if…’ scenario.

You might ask yourself:

 

What did I learn from analysing the gap between estimated and achieved results?

 

What can be increased, decreased, reversed, separated or bundled together?

 

What would I do if I had to reach the ‘finishing line’ in half the time?

 

What three priority actions will I implement in my life and in my business as a result of my discoveries?

After employing the strategy, analyse the results to verify its efficiency and dedicate time for revision. Get rid of what isn’t working and continue to implement what is.

 

Just remember that crafting a few different but realistic alternatives and evaluating them using clear criteria will yield a true strategic plan that creates a vision for the future, rather than a reflection of the past. Do not keep changing it all the time. Also remember to give enough time for the strategy to prove its worthiness or failure by monitoring its results. :-)

 

Decide on key action steps, accountability measures and timing, but also agree on how to monitor the environment for any unexpected opportunities or necessary changes that might warrant modifications to the plan.

 

What are the benefits of employing the best strategy available?

We all need to have a strategy in place if we want to achieve our success. It will help us to keep focused and stay on track. If we do not have a direction and a scope before we initiate any plan, it will be very difficult to succeed. In business terms, owning a business is not about work, it is about the strategy we employ. This highlights the concept of working smarter and not harder.

do it

To the employment of your most successful strategy:-)!

Viv:-)

Keys to Manage Stress

Hello to all my readers :-)

Have you ever felt like a mouse running on a tread wheel and getting nowhere?

Have you ever felt angry because you work so many hours and do not have the time to spend with your dear ones?

You can feel assure that you are not alone. According to a mental-health charity in the UK, 1 in 5  British workers said that stress had made them physically sick during their career, and unmanageable pressure had caused 1 in 4 to cry while at work. Prescriptions for antidepressants saw an unprecedented rise during one recent year of economic recession.

To manage any issues, we need to get to understand the stress cycle and the root of the problem.

Stress cycle

Ask yourself:

What has caused you stress?

The answer could be multiple, for example: insecurity – financial or health, a demanding routine, interpersonal conflicts or a traumatic experience.

Sources of stress

Also ask: ‘How has stress affected you?’

Stress Body Mind

Some symptoms could be health disorders, emotional exhaustion, sleep problems, deteriorating relationships or depression.

You also need to remember that stress activates an amazing system in your body, your emergency response system. Hormones are released to increase your breathing, heart rate and blood pressure.

So learning how to deal with stress is important to both your physical and mental well-being.

How can we manage stress?

outsourcing stress

Stress in itself is not necessarily harmful. The American Psychological Association has noted: ‘Stress is to the human condition what tension is to the violin string: too little and the music is dull and raspy; too much and the music is shrill or the string snaps. Stress can be the kiss of death or the spice of life. The issue, really, is how to manage it.’

I also came across to a very good quote of stress:

stress is

Here some practical advice to manage stress:

  1. Insecurity

Not one of us has total security.

How can we cope with feelings of insecurity?

Try these suggestions:

* Confide in a trusted family member or friend. Studies show that the support of loved ones consistently confers protection against stress-related disorders.

* Focus on positive scenarios. If you focus on negatives ones, they will drain your emotional reserves. Remember that what you fear may not happen.

  1. Demanding routine

A relentless routine of commuting, working, studying or caring for children or elderly parents can keep stress level high.

Moreover, stopping some of these activities may be out of question.

What can we do to cope?

* Give yourself some downtime, and get adequate rest.

* Set sound priorities and adopt a modest lifestyle. Consider simplifying your life, perhaps by reducing expenses or time spent at work.

‘Making certain lifestyle changes is the best start’ to relieving stress’, says the National Institutes of Health (NIH) in the US.

Start with eating a well-balanced, healthy diet as well as getting enough sleep and exercise. Also limit caffeine and alcohol intake and don’t use nicotine, cocaine or other street drugs.’ The NIH also suggests taking breaks from work, spending time with family or friends, learning to make things with your hands, hobbies or learning to play a musical instrument. I will also add dancing.

stress management

To your success :-)

Viv :-)

Arnold Schwarzenegger’s 6 Rules for Success

A very good evening to all my readers :-)

Hope my post finds you well and dandy :-)

Have you ever experienced feeling exhausted after you put so much effort into pursuing a goal?

Have you ever felt discouraged when you realize that you are still so far from your objectives no matter how strong your desire is to achieve them?

Have you ever asked yourself ‘what are the rules of success of accomplished people?

I personally have experienced all of the above and I can guarantee you that these are not pleasant feelings, they cause a lot of frustration and they can bring you to breaking point.

In my quest to find an answer to the question of obtaining success, I came across Arnold Schwarzenegger’ speech for Harvard University. Even though I am personally more familiar with the thinking of Rocky and Mohammed Ali; I have to be honest and say that when I listened to Schwarzenegger’s rules of success, they really resonated with me so I decided to share them with you. :-)

Arnold-6Rules-Success-e1367511772942

Here is a transcription of Arnold Schwarzenegger’s speech:

‘And, of course, people ask me all the time; they say to me, ‘What is the secret of success?

Before I start, I just want to say that these are my rules and I think that they can be applied to everyone but that is for you to decide, because not everyone is the same. Some people like to kick back, cruise through life, others want to be very intense, they want to be always number one and be successful, that is like me. I always wanted to be very intense and I always wanted to be number one. I took it very seriously in my career. This is the same when I started body building, I didn’t want just be a body builder champion, I wanted to be the best body builder at all times. The same was in the movies. I didn’t want just to be a movie star but I wanted to be a great movie star and I wanted to be a highly paid movie star. This intensity always paid off for me, this commitment always paid off for me:-)

These are my rules:

The 1st rule is: TRUST YOURSELF.

trust yrself

What is most important thing is that you have to dig deep down, dig deep down and ask yourselves:

‘Who do you want to be?’

Not what but WHO?

arnold-schwarzeneggar-speech-who do u want to be

I am talking about not what your parents and teachers want you to be, but YOU. I am talking about figuring out for yourselves what makes you HAPPY. No matter how crazy it may sound to other people. :-)

So rule number one is, of course, trust yourself no matter how and what anyone else thinks. I was lucky when I grew up as I did not have so many destruction as you have today such as TV, telephone, computer, i-pad, i-pod, twitter, etc. I spent a lot of time by myself so I could figure out and really listened to what was inside my heart and my head. I recognised very quickly that I had the stronger desire to leave my little village and be part of something bigger where dreams could come true. :-)

Rule number 2 is: BREAK THE RULES.

break the rules

We have so many rules in life about everything. I say break the rules. No the law, but break the rules. It is impossible to be a maverick or a true original if you are too well behaved and don’t want to break the rules.

You have to think outside the box. That is what I believe.

After all, what is the point of being on this earth if all you want to do is be liked by everyone and avoid trouble?

The only way that I ever got anyplace was by breaking some of the rules.

Which, of course, brings me to rule number 3: DON’T BE AFRAID TO FAIL.

don_t_be_afraid_to_fail___by_jandesignofficial-d7a6fzf

Anything I have ever attempted, I was always willing to fail.  You can’t always win, but don’t be afraid of making decisions.  You can’t be paralyzed by fear of failure or you will never push yourself. You keep pushing because you believe in yourself and in your vision and you know that it is the right thing to do and success will come:-)

So don’t be afraid to fail.

Which brings me to rule number 4: DON’T LISTEN TO THE NAYSAYERS.

Arnold Schwazenneger Dont listen to the naysayers

How many times have you heard that you can’t do this, you can’t do that and it’s never been done before?

I love it when someone says that no one has never done this before, because then when I do it that means that I am the first one that has done it. So pay no attention to the people that say it can’t be done.

I always listen to myself and say: ‘Yes, you can.’ :-)

Yes you can

And that brings me to rule number 5, which is the most important rule of all: WORK YOUR BUTT OFF.

Arnold-Schwarzenegger work hard 1

I always believed leaving no stone unturned, Mohammed Ali, one of my great heroes, had a great line in the ‘70s when he was asked: ‘How many sit-ups do you do?’ He said, ‘I don’t count my sit-ups. I only start counting when it starts hurting. When I feel pain, that’s when I start counting and that’s when it really counts.’  That’s what makes you a champion. And that’s the way it is with everything. NO PAIN NO GAIN:-)

Let me tell you, it is important to have fun in life, of course. But when you are out there partying, horsing around, someone out there at the same time is working hard, someone is getting smarter and someone is winning. Just remember that. :-)

If you want to cruise through life than don’t pay attention to none of these rules, but if you want to win, there is absolutely no way around hard, hard work.

None of my rules, by the way, of success, will work unless you do.

I have always figured out that there are 24 hours a day. You sleep 6 hours and have 18 hours left. I know that there are some of you out there that say well, wait a minute; I sleep eight hours or nine hours. Well. Then, just sleep faster, I would recommend. ‘Early to bed, early to rise, work like hell and advertise.’ – L. Peter

Arnold-Schwarzenegger-sleep faster

Just remember, you can’t climb the ladder of success with your hands in the pockets:-)

And that takes me to rule number 6, which is a very important rule: IT’S ABOUT GIVING BACK.

GIVING BACK

Whatever path that you take in your lives, you must always find time to give something back, something back to your community, give something back to your state or to your country.

If you tear down the mirror that makes you always look at yourself, you will be able to look behind that mirror and you will see the millions of people that need your help. Let me tell you something, reaching out and helping people will bring you more satisfaction than everything else you have ever done.’ :-)

giving back arnold

I invite you to listen to the full inspirational speech by Arnold Schwarzenegger:-)

Personally, I believe that the last rule is the most important one. It has helped me to achieve most, if not all, of my successes in life. It has also gifted me with the most amazing satisfaction and accomplishments without forgetting that along the way I came to know so many remarkable people. Thank you for sharing my journey that made me a better person! :-)

VIV 2013

The only rule that I don’t agree 100% with Schwarzenegger is his most important rule: WORK HARD! I have been working very hard all my life, however in the last few years, I realised that whilst working hard is very important, working smarter is more efficient as it saves time and energy to enjoy the results of our own hard work :-)

I believe that the most important point that Schwarzenegger made in his speech is at the beginning where he said that his rules can be applied to everyone but everyone is not the same therefore you have to decide which rules to apply based on your personality. :-) In fact, I personally would have swapped some of his rules for others and added a few more, because these suit my personality more based on my experiences.

Remember that your personality and experiences will lead to your own rules to success as we are all amazingly unique and we all have different life journeys. :-) On this note, I wish to my dear Bro, all the happiness and success in the world as he truly deserves it on his special day! :-):-):-)

people-in-yr-life1

Thank you for all the amazing moments and lessons learnt, the most important of which is learning to dance in the rain :-)

Dance-in-the-Rain

Life is not about waiting for the storm to pass, it is about learning to dance in the rain.’ – Vivian Greene

To your rules of Success :-)

Viv :-)

17 Winning Mindset Tips

To all my readers :)

Wish you are all well and dandy :)

 

Have you ever felt inadequate and overwhelmed in the face of challenges?

Have you ever experienced that your challenges seemed bigger than they actually were?

How do you feel when you need to overcome an obstacle to achieve your goal?

Obstacles 1

I was recently having a conversation with a friend and the subject of positive mindset during difficult times arose. At the time, as I was emotionally involved in her story, I could not think of a process or any practical tips I could offer her. As I left her house, I was bothered by the fact that even though mindset is one of my strengths, I was unable to use it as needed. After some consideration, I started to think about the mental process I use to conquer my challenges. Thus, this article just flew as a response to my conversation with my friend. I hope you too can benefit from it as I do. :)

It is generally acknowledged that when confronted with problems and challenges, it is easy to become overwhelmed, especially when the circumstances are unfamiliar and seem threatening and urgent. However, no matter what life throws your way, keep in mind that there are always options available, there are always things you can do, actions you can take and decisions you can make that will keep moving you forward in the right direction. :)

Here is my mindset process and 17 winning mindset tips which I personally use for conquering my obstacles:

1. Keep Things Simple

Simple 1

When dealing with obstacles, simplicity is key to your success! The more we complicate things, the more likely circumstances will overwhelm us. You must therefore keep things as simple and straightforward as possible; I can personally testify that the toughest of problems are often solved in the simplest of ways. So, if you have a simple approach to whatever you are aiming for, you are already a step ahead and in the top 3% of successful people. I have attended numerous self-development courses on a variety of subjects and the commonality of all of them is keep things simple:)

2. Step Back Emotionally

emotions

The reality is that when unexpected obstacles suddenly show up, it is easy to react emotionally to the circumstances, we all do it. However, emotional reactions are often unproductive, making the situation worse. Instead we must learn to step back from our emotions and see the situation from an external perspective — through logic and reason. It is only once we grasp the circumstances from an intellectual perspective that we begin to identify the true relevance and significance of the events that have taken place. It sounds logical, but much easier said than done. However if you apply it, I can guarantee you will reap the benefits. :)

3. Cultivate an Active Mindset & other Indispensable Qualities

mind can achieve

Now that have you stepped back emotionally, you can focus on your mindset. Would you agree that you are unlikely to overcome an obstacle if you don’t believe that you are capable of overcoming it? Your doubts will only paralyze you and focus your mind on the problems rather than the solution. You must therefore develop the necessary confidence and self-belief that will help you think more effectively about how to solve the complications in your life.

An active mindset helps you to proactively deal with challenging circumstances. It is a mindset that asks effective questions; always looks for new answers, opportunities and solutions; it is flexible, adaptable and constantly learns from past mistakes, while moving forward towards the attainment of its goals and objectives. :)

Those who successfully overcome obstacles in their lives, consistently cultivate the following qualities:

  • Positive Mindset
  • Confidence
  • Self Belief and Self Esteem
  • Gratitude
  • Optimism
  • Commitment
  • Resilience
  • Discipline
  • Patience
  • Enthusiasm
  • Wisdom

4. Don’t Blame others and don’t dwell on the Negatives

blaming

Now that we have acquired a positive mindset, it is paramount that you do not blame yourself or others for the circumstances you find yourself in. Yes, you can acknowledge that you or someone was at fault, however it is often not the person but rather the systems and processes in place that lead to this outcome. Access and revaluate these, do not lay blame, and the obstacles you are facing will eventually be conquered.

Remember, when you dwell on what you don’t want, you will get more of the same, because we attract what we focus on. Therefore if you focus on worst case scenarios that will rip your life apart, then you are not focusing on solutions, and if you are not focusing on solutions then you are unlikely to find the answers you need to help you overcome your problems.

5. Accept and Acknowledge Circumstances

acceptance

Once you have an active mindset, you can accept and acknowledge your circumstances. When confronted with an obstacle, the worst thing we can do is to deny that the problem exists. When we deny that something exists we close ourselves off to potential solutions, answers and opportunities. We must accept and acknowledge the circumstances for what they are from an optimistic, solution orientated yet very realistic perspective. :)

6. Acquire a Different Perspectives

perspective

Now you can gain a different perspective. Sometimes obstacles are only as real as we make them out to be. In fact at times obstacles are simply misunderstandings and generalizations that we have made about circumstances. At other times obstacles are only as real as the assumptions that are clouding our vision.

To begin shifting your perspective, start by viewing the situation you find yourself in from another person’s perspective. Alternatively you can use a plethora of framing and reframing techniques that will help you shift the way you think about your circumstances. :)

7. Adjust Your Priorities

priority

If you have actioned all of the above, you are ready to adjust your priorities. At times we are unable to overcome certain obstacles in our lives because our priorities are simply out of order. This is especially relevant when you consider that spending more time concentrating on developing a certain skill or gaining knowledge in a specific area of your life would have a significant impact on your ability to overcome difficult circumstances. :)

8. Ask Effective Questions

questions quality

Asking effective questions can help you gather new and different perspectives about your life and circumstances. You might want to review my previous article ‘8 Steps Process to overcoming obstacles.’ Combined, thees provide a powerful example of how questions can be used  to help shift your perspective and unlock your potential:)

9. Assess Your Obstacles

hurdles

You will rarely be able to overcome an obstacle unless you are able to figure out how it originated and weaselled its way into your life.

Ask yourself:

What went wrong?

What could have caused this?

What must I do now?

10. Think Critically and Creatively

Critical and creative thinking 1

A calm state provides you with clarity of mind, which enables you to ask better questions, think more creatively, critically and effectively about your problems. When your mind and body is calm, you naturally tap into a reservoir of internal resources that you wouldn’t have access to if you were to react emotionally to circumstances.

Throughout the course of human history obstacles and problems have been the foundations of creative and critical thinking. Or viewed in another way, without obstacles and problems there would be no need for creative or critical thought. You must therefore use these two tools to help you unlock the solutions and answers you need that will help you overcome the obstacles in your life. :)

11. List Possible Options by Experimenting in New Ways

options

Now that you have empowered yourself with powerful tools, you can tap into different options to conquer your challenges. Difficulties have a tendency to mentally lock us up, thus limiting our ability to think and gain perspective of a situation. In such instances we must realize that solutions can only be found when we open our minds to possibilities and options that we hadn’t considered before.

To do this, simply sit down with a pen and paper and ask yourself over and over again:

How can I overcome this obstacle?

What options haven’t I considered?

As previously mentioned, asking effective questions will help you gain new insights into the obstructions standing in your way. Use this information to try previously unconsidered methods and directions. It is the path less travelled that will make all the difference in the end. :)

The more options you have, the more opportunity you will have to find a suitable answer to the problem you are facing. :)

12. Seek Guidance & Gain Necessary Support and Resources

Advice Help Support And Tips Signpost Showing Information And Gu

Once you have written your list of options, tap into other people’s experiences and expertise. Often the answers we need to help us overcome the obstacles in our lives can be found by simply talking to other people. In fact, other people might have already successfully overcome the circumstances you find yourself in. As I do, seek out mentors, life coaches and experts to help you find the answers you need to move you forward towards your goals and objectives. :)

At times we simply do not have the necessary resources to help us deal with the situation at hand. In such circumstances we must question what pieces of the puzzle are currently missing, and then look for the necessary tools, strategies, knowledge and support we need to help us overcome this obstacle successfully:)

When we look for sympathy from others, we come from a point of weakness and an inability to control our fate and destiny. We must instead look to come from a place of personal empowerment, where we take full responsibility for our life and circumstances. This of course does not mean that we shouldn’t ask for help or assistance. What it does mean is that we should focus on exploring options that will move us forwards, towards the attainment of our goals and objectives. :)

13. Breathe, Take Control and Take Action

breathe

take control

take action

Now that we have worked on our mind set, assessed and evaluated our obstacles and looked for options and guidance, it is time to TAKE ACTION! It is true that when obstacles overwhelm us, our automatic response is to freeze. At first, this paralysis may seem unhelpful however it gives us time to consider and think strategically about the circumstances we find ourselves in. However, if we don’t take action, the obstacles will remain; nobody can remove them for us!

Take a moment to breathe deeply and ask yourself the following questions:

What is it that I control?

What is it that I don’t control?

How can I gain control over these circumstances?

If I cannot gain control, then how can I influence these circumstances?

If I cannot influence them, then maybe I am not seeing things clearly. Where must I look for more information?

By asking these questions and taking action you will begin to gain control over your circumstances and you can start to build momentum, enabling you to move forward towards your goals. :)

14. Take Small Steps

big-journeys-begin-small-steps 1

To start with, take small steps, this ensures that you remain in control and do not get overwhelmed by your circumstances. Break down what you need to do into small manageable chunks, and then progressively work on one or more chunks per day until you successfully reach your desired outcome.

15. Make Necessary Sacrifices

sacrifice

It’s now short-term sacrifice for long-term results time! The majority of us are simply unwilling to make the necessary sacrifices that would help us successfully overcome the problems we are confronting. Sometimes it’s not what we do, but rather what we let go of that will have the greatest impact on our lives. The effort and sacrifice required will be proportionate to your obstacles, don’t expect anything less. However, I can assure you that the rewards will be far greater than the sacrifice needed to conquer your challenges. :)

16. Learn from your Mistakes

mistakes

Now that you have taken some decisions and actioned them, don’t expect that everything will suddenly work out perfectly, you will make mistakes along your way to success. Remember that progress is built upon a myriad of mistakes that we make on a daily basis. I have made countless errors along my journey, some were big, others smaller, but one thing is certain, they were all significant in helping me learn the lessons I needed to learn. You too will learn from your mistakes and move forward in conquering your challenges. :)

Take time to learn from every unsuccessful attempt, from every failed result, and from every unsatisfactory outcome. The more you learn, the more you will grow and the better you will be able to deal with the obstacles that lie ahead on your path. :)

17. Do not Quit!

dont_quit

 

NO MATTER WHAT, DO NOT QUIT, because, as I have personally experienced, the greatest opportunities are always interlocked with the most difficult struggles of your life. I can definitely vouch for this. :)

Remember, to conquer your obstacles will not be easy. Challenges are all around to test us, to help build our character and strengthen our fortitude. Sometimes we might fall over. It is how we pick ourselves up and move forward one step at a time that will determine our success! :)

obstacles michael jordan

‘No matter how many times I break down, there is always a little piece of me that says NO, you are not done yet. Get BACK UP! The greatest human quality is that of becoming unstoppable! And you become unstoppable by refusing to quit, no matter what happens.‘ – Brian Tracy

To your successful mindset empowerment! :)

Viv :)

Double Winner Awards Author of ‘The book on Success‘

www.vivoliver.com

8 Steps Process to overcoming your obstacles

A warm greeting to all my readers :)

‘If you can find a path with no obstacles, it probably doesn’t lead anywhere.’ — Frank A. Clark

Have you ever experienced difficulties and challenges before achieving one of your goals?

Have you ever appreciated something that came easily to you? Or did you appreciate it more when you sacrificed and made a real effort to achieve your goal?

Have you ever heard of the lottery winners who are worse off today than they were before they won?

They squandered their winnings because it held no value for them, they didn’t have to struggle through the obstacles, challenges and problems that self-made millionaires face, as a result even though their dream had materialised they weren’t able to hold onto it. As the saying goes ‘Easy come, easy go.’

It’s not so surprising when you think about how you feel when you achieve your goals easily or when you achieve them by overcoming obstacles.

greater the obstacle...

Which process gives you more satisfaction?

satisfaction-

I recently experienced a tough period achieving my goals; I overcome these by working on my mindset which led to this article.

I hope it helps you to deal with the obstacles that you will likely face as you progress along your journey towards the attainment of your objectives. :)

To commence, setting goals is the first step… achieving them is the second step… and surely, it is at this second step that most of us stumble. We stumble not because the goal is unachievable, but rather because of unexpected obstacles and challenges that arise along the journey that make the goal seem unachievable.

benefits of setting goals on blackboard

It is important to understand that every goal we set naturally comes with a plethora of landmines that are attached to that goal which show up in our lives as a set of hurdles, tests and problems that we must surpass in order to get to our end destination. In fact, unless we successfully manoeuvre through these difficulties and overcome them, then we will fail to learn the valuable lessons that are required to help us grow towards each stage and most importantly keep our goal when we get there. 

obstacles zig ziglar

There are three types of obstacles that you will likely face.

Firstly, personal barriers, which are related to your psychology, behaviour and state-of-mind, include limiting habits, debilitating emotions, fears and beliefs that prevent us from moving forward because of the negative thinking, inhibiting our ability to make effective decisions and undertake appropriate action that would help us create the momentum we need to get to our desired outcome.

Secondly, environmental difficulties, these are unexpected external occurrences and circumstances that we have little control over and we are usually ill-prepared to deal with these effectively. However, if we research and set in place contingency plans, we stand a greater chance of pre-empting potential pitfalls and even influencing the outcome.

To do this, begin by following Murphy’s Law:

Anything that can go wrong, will go wrong at the worst possible time, all of the time when you least expect it. 

 murphy's law

So what are you going to do about it?

 

When you plan for the future, you gather a better understanding of the possible scenarios and consequences of your decisions and actions. Planning also gives you insight into additional resources you may need to help you overcome environmental obstacles that you could face on the journey ahead. :)

Plan-Design

Thirdly, social obstructions are related to people who either do no cooperate, sabotage you, or are incompetent and unable to fulfill the responsibilities assigned to them. Again it’s essential to forward plan and ensure that you clarify your needs adequately, your knowledge thoroughly and your instructions carefully. It also helps to develop strong bonds and relationships with the people you rely on most, safeguarding any future breakdown in communication. However don’t confuse this with trying to control people’s behaviour, decisions and actions. Instead subtly influence people and understand their needs, motives and desires. Only in this way will you successfully improve your chances of maneuvering through the social obstacles in your life.

TAKE ACTION NOW: Identify if any of these obstacles are currently preventing you from getting what you want most out of life, and choose today to take control of your thought patterns and begin making far more effective decisions. :)

effective-decision-making

As a coach, I often work with clients who are struggling to overcome personal and business obstacles. They don’t know what to do, where to begin or how to move forward. In such instances, I will ask them a series of questions that help them gain a new perspective and understanding about their circumstances. As a result they begin to unlock hidden resources they never realized they had. :)

life's challenges

I have listed below the ‘8 Steps Process to overcome your obstacles’ and integrated them with specific questions which will help you overcome your obstacles too:

STEP 1. Question the Problem

question

What are the indications that this is a problem for you?

How do you know this is accurate?

STEP 2. Question the Origins of the Problem

questions & qnswers

How did all this start?

Who or what perpetuates this problem?

STEP 3. Identify the Details

details

When did it happen?

How did it happen?

Where did it happen?

STEP 4. Determine the Consequences

Value_Graphic

What would happen if you ignored it?

When could it become a bigger problem?

What could lead to this specific outcome?

How does this affect you?

How does this affect others?

How does this affect your external life?

What other problems might be caused by resolving this obstacle?

STEP 5. Take Control

take control

Whose behaviour do you control?

What aspects of this problem can you control?

What aspects of this problem can’t you control?

How must you respond to what you can’t control?

STEP 6. Identify the Positives

positive

What is happening that is good?

What would you like to have continue to happen?

STEP 7. Gain Perspective

two points perspectives

What are your assumptions about this?

How are your assumptions contributing to the problem?

What is another perspective you haven’t considered?

Who has successfully overcome this problem?

What can you learn from this person?

STEP 8. Expand Your Options & Take Decisive Action

Just-Do-It (1)

What could you do differently?

Who could assist you?

Where haven’t you looked for a solution?

What action can I take to solve this obstacle?

How will you know when this problem has been resolved?

What is your criteria for success?

Remember, obstacles are just ‘things’ that are there to teach, strengthen and fortify you for the journey that lies ahead. We must therefore not view them as insurmountable problems that will prevent us from achieving our goals, but rather as small, and sometimes large, stepping stones that are mandatory ‘lessons’ we need to pass in order to obtain our Ph.D. in Goal Achievement. :)

obstacles m jordan

And finally, it is important to remind ourselves of the indispensable lesson that many former Lottery winners have found out the hard way, that there is only one thing worse than being poor, and that is ‘being rich and then being poor once again’. 

During the past years, this is the lesson that I have most appreciated, as I have learnt it by paying the most expensive price:

‘Take time to learn the lessons that life throws your way, because these lessons will be critical to your success as you move forward into the future.’ Viv :)

life-lessons

‘If you can find a path with no obstacles, it probably doesn’t lead anywhere.’ – Frank A. Clark

overcome obstacles

Obstacles are placed in our way

To successfully overcoming your obstacles! :)

Viv :)

Take the 21 Day Challenge!

VIV’S CALL TO ACTION!!! :)

It is time to get busy!

I am challenges you to stop settling; to move from where you are to where you deserve to be.

I want to help motivate you to stop accepting the life that was given to you and make a serious and conscientious effort toward the life you want. With that being said, I ask you a favour… TAKE THE CHALLENGE! :)

GIVE 150% FOR 21 DAYS!

21 day challenge 1

NEXT STEPS: Upon accepting the 21 Day Challenge, I ask that you make the following 3 steps:

1) CAST A VISION vision

What will your life look like after 21 days?

What do you want to happen?

What is mediocre?

What bondage will you break?

2) DO IT RIGHT! do it right Do it right or don’t do it at all!

The time of doing things by half is over.

Stop putting in 50, 60 or even 70 percent effort.

Only accept 150% for 21 days!

3) NO EXCUSES, ONLY ADJUSTMENTS! no excuses

Everyone has excuses but Viv doesn’t want to hear them and neither should you. The time for excuses has run out! 00:00 After 21 Days:

  • Document your findings.
  • Share your true growth.
  • Tell us what changed and send us your video.

If you are on a team, or coach, share your success story within the locker room or on the playing fields.

If you teach or sit in the classroom, share your success that way.

Perhaps you need a change in the workplace; we want to hear that too.

No matter where you are in life, you can make a difference in your situation.

It starts TODAY, so join the movement! :)

This is my personal 21 Day Challenge:

2 hours daily workout in preparation to my Tough Mudder

Lose 1% body fat

Gain 1% muscle

Cycling, running and walking as only means of transport.

What about your 21 Day Challenge? 

21 days to break an habit

Remember, I truly can’t wait to see how your life will change in the next 21 days.

I am super excited to hear your feedback; to hear about your successes and your triumphs as well as to share my personal one with you.

amazing

Remember: When you put in 150 percent you get back 150 plus! 

I can personally vouch for it Go ahead! Put on your hard hat and let’s get to work. :)  

Without struggle, there is no progress. ‘Without struggle, there is no strength.’ – Oprah doesnt challenge

I encourages you to learn from your past instead of allowing it to stop you from achieving your goals and use its lessons to make the rest of your time the best of your life. :)

When you know better, you’ll do better. So, now you know! Stop giving 70, 80, or even 90 percent…

Put in 150% and help change the lives of others around you.

Your 150% affects your family, friends and community. :)

Let’s go! Let’s work! Take the 21 Day Challenge! :) 21 day challenge heapi

I am also participating at the Tough Mudder and I have a fundraising page  https://localgiving.com/vivthoughmudder where you can donate as little as you can!

Every donation will go to the charity organisation Urban Voice UK who TEACHES YOUNG PEOPLE HOW TO BE SUCCESSFUL. It has used Creativity, Entrepreneurship,  Education  & personal development training to engage youth across the UK, for over 10 years. Through its courses and programmes, participants many from disadvantages backgrounds have gone on to obtain a degree, find jobs and pursue their career paths.

Thank you for your generosity and for being part of young people lives :)

given To your 21 day Challenge Success! :)

Viv :)

Discover your inner Mandela. Call for action : Become the Leader of Tomorrow!

Hello to everyone :)

Hope my latest post finds you well :)

Have you ever wondered why some people have a greater influence than others?

Have you ever wondered how people become leaders?

Have you ever asked yourself: ‘How can I tell if I am a good leader, or perhaps even a great one?’

5-Hidden-Qualities-of-a-Great-Leader

‘It is better to lead from behind and to put others in front, especially when you celebrate victory when nice things occur. You take the front line when there is danger. Then people will appreciate your leadership.’ – Nelson Mandela

Mandela leadership

What a description of a leader!

I hope most of you will agree that Nelson Mandela is a shining example of what a leader should epitomize. His positive impact not only inspired his country but the minds, hearts, and souls of billions across the world. :)

We could speak endlessly of his courage, principles and his commitment to righteousness, his contributions to the African continent, his suffering and sacrifices, his humble roots and his too-numerous-to-mention accolades.

However, what he is a supreme example of is how to be a leader. :)

Mandela do  it again

In broad terms leaders fall into two categories, tough or nice.

If you’re tough — a “driver” — you can push people to go beyond the limits of their abilities.

If you’re nice — an “enhancer” — you can better understand the needs, problems, and concerns of your charges.

It’s a hard choice and therefore being a leader is not straightforward.

Being successful is not easy, being a leader is not easy, and not getting torn down by negative influences is even harder. My coaches and mentors have told me that there is a lot of room at the top, but it’s the bottom that’s crowded. We have two choices in life; we can either live in an ocean of sameness or a lake of differentiation.

Which one do you choose?

It’s your personal choice, no one can make it for you, so be wise in your decision. :)

So what does it take to be a leader?

Here are 6 of Mandela’s transformational lessons that could turn you into the next leader.

 

1. Be a Visionary

Mandela vision

‘Give us clear vision that we may know where to stand and what to stand for – because unless we stand for something we shall fall for anything’ – Peter Marshall

A clear vision helps you pursue dreams and achieve goals; an idea of the future, a strong wish. A vision that is clear will open your mind to the endless possibilities of the future. :)

Make a mental picture in your mind, add feelings and emotions to that mental picture, envisage taking every step to its completion, give thanks like you’ve already received your wish and keep the emotions parallel to the vision. Do the things that will contribute to your vision and in time it will manifest. :)

Being a visionary will help you to overcome obstacles and hold on when times are tough. A vision that is well defined helps you to focus and create a purpose that becomes your measurement for your success. A strong and compelling vision is in line with your values, interests and desires. It connects with your passions and greatest potential giving you the edge in bringing it into reality. You feel much more valuable as a person when you set and achieve visions and goals. :)

You can see that being a visionary is key to success throughout your life. It determines whether you win or lose. Vision gives you a glimpse of your inner potential. Being a visionary is 50% mental completion process and 50% physically acting towards that vision. This mental completion process requires that you see with your mind and not with your eyes, the reason for this is that what you see with your eyes can contradict and potentially compromise your vision and therefore your goal.

Remember that vision is something you will actually achieve. You should follow the law of taking action. Action is not something you say but rather something you do. So get off your ASSETS and make something happen. Leaders ooze action, they move mountains, plough through obstacles and refuse to take no for an answer. They don’t sit on the couch waiting for the world to come to them. They are visionaries and they make their lives happen:)

Mandela impossible

 

2. In leadership, character is more important than strategy

Mandela character

General H. Norman Schwarzkopf once defined leadership as a potent combination of strategy and character but, he said, if you ever have to be without one, be without the strategy. Some of Mandela’s questionable strategies and decisions could easily have led to his political undoing but his strength of character as a leader compensated for occasional lapses of judgement.

Where did Mandela develop his remarkable resolve and character as a leader?

These qualities emerged early during his school-years. His anti-apartheid convictions resulted in expulsions and continuous strife with school authorities. Despite consistent misdemeanours he made it into law school, passed the bar and went on to establish the most successful black law firm in South Africa – a remarkable feat in those days. Eventually, he would serve 27 years hard labour. In his later years in prison– he was finally released in 1990 – he was offered his freedom if he would renounce his commitment to armed struggle. He refused.

3. Be prepared for Short Term Sacrifice

real leaders

Leaders know that one of the key ingredients to success is short term sacrifice for long term success. They evaluate their cost opportunity before taking any decision to ensure that the benefits gained will be worth more than the sacrifices made. However, everyone needs to sacrifice something; this is part of the journey of life. :)

Think: if Mandela could sacrifice 27 years of his life for the greater good of the South African people, I am adamant that you can lay off all the distractions and temptations that are stopping you from achieving your goals. Here is a valuable tip: Resist temptation and stay strong because the sacrifices you make now will bear fruit for the rest of your life. :)

4. Make Gut based Decisions

Mandela courage

Every leader makes decisions fast. There are 3 ways to think: with our mind, heart and gut.

When you think with your mind, the more reasons you are going to find not to do something.  This is called analysis by paralysis.

The second way is to think with the heart. These tend to be emotionally based decisions not driven by logic or reason but something that is hard to describe. Many people have been burned doing this.

The third way is to think with your gut. Research has shown that intuition – a feeling that something is right or wrong – is one of the ways our brains store, process and retrieves information.  The brain draws on past experiences and current external cues to make a decision; a process so rapid that the reaction is subconscious. This is why when we make a decision with our gut we are often right but once our brains and hearts become involved things start to get cloudy.

Remember the lesson here is to make decisions on the spot and then you can re-evaluate them. Entrepreneurs don’t say I have to think about it, they make a decision and then they re-evaluate it.

5. Be Innovative

Innovation

Leaders are innovative, continually thinking forward to the next trend or invention. If you don’t keep asking yourself how do I cut through the clutter, how do I differentiate myself… there is little chance you will ever succeed and even less become a leader.

Remember how you change is how you succeed and if you don’t, you will never truly live the life you want and you deserve.

Remember there is someone behind you who is looking at taking your place in the market.

Mandela success and failure

6. Be Humble, Forgive & Give

Mandela prison

He also understood the power of forgiveness. Despite 27 years in prison, he emerged with his sense of justice intact — but no discernible bitterness. He maintained his faith in people no matter what, that people would come right in the end, he said. He was in a prison for something he didn’t do and when he came out the first thing he did was forgive the person that had put him there. The world is a challenging and cold place at times, seeing through that and trying to make a difference is difficult but a great leader cannot hold grudges.

Mandela was a humble man. He didn’t cling to power. He empowered. He announced during the election that he would serve only one five-year term – a remarkable action not only in Africa, a continent riddled with corrupt leaders who refuse to cede power, but also for someone who had waited so long and given so much to reach that position. A leader has to be better than his detractors, he has to be humble and not allow his ego to get in the way. He has think of the greater good. He has to freely share with the world his knowledge, experience, expertise and acumen:)

Mandela Humble

He was a courageous and resolute leader. His character and visionary actions, stamina and resilience were profound. Yet, his most enduring legacy will not be the things he did, but what he didn’t do, he was the pattern breaker and refused to succumb to the seductive pull of revenge and the politics of hatred that infected large parts of the anti-apartheid movement. As a consequence, South Africa was saved from a grizzly civil war that would have torn the nation apart. That will be his greatest legacy. :)

M

Nelson Mandela played his role magnificently and we can learn great lessons from his life. He served as a role model, conveying messages through his personal actions and his words about what kind of behaviour, what kind of culture, would characterize the new South Africa he envisioned. :)

But now it’s time for a new generation of leaders to emerge, leaders willing and motivated to empower and develop other leaders to confront corruption and transform institutions for good. Great leaders create great leaders:)

Leaders create leaders

Mandela’s legacy is larger than racial justice and more widespread than his country or continent. His legacy lies in the lessons about leadership he left for all of us. His goal was to change not only laws but behaviour.

What is your greatest legacy?

You are the only person that can honestly answer this question.

There is a potential leader inside us all Leadership is something that is contagious and spreads for the greater good of us all. There is no perfect manual on how to be a great leader but rather great people we look up to and try to emulate in our own way. I know personally that if it was not for my coaches and mentors, I wouldn’t even be writing this article. :)

This is one of my favourite quotes: ‘There is no passion to be found playing small – in settling for a life that is less than the one you are capable of living.’ – Nelson Mandela

Mandela no playing small

Life is full of choices. And each of us has the choice of how we want to impact the world. Some choose to leave the world a worse place than they found it. Some choose to leave it the same as they found it. Some choose to leave it a much better place. :)

Mandela what counts in life

Which one is your choice?

Just remember that ‘We can change the world and make it a better place. It is in your hands to make a difference.’ – N. Mandela mandela change the world

You have the power beyond measure to achieve what you want and to become the next leader of tomorrow! 

 Mandela deepest fear

Mandela next generation leader

To the discovery of your inner leader :)

Viv :)

Double Winner Awards Author of ‘The book on Success

www.vivoliver.com

If your dreams don’t scare you, you are not DREAMING BIG enough!

Hope my blog finds you all well :)

What were your dreams when you were growing up?

What did you want to be, have and do?

Were they BIG DREAMS that made you feel excited?

Lowell Lundstrum’s quote is the mouthful title of my first article for 2014. In my blog I concluded 2013 talking about achieved goals, celebrating them and discovering your own personal formula for success in preparation for an amazing and joyful 2014. If you have not read it, here is the link: My personal note: THANK YOU 🙂

celebrate success 1

To start this New Year let’s go back in time and remind ourselves of our dreams when we were growing up. :) We had so much clarity, vision and belief that we could do anything we wished, ideas without limits but above all we were not afraid to DREAM BIG. It doesn’t have to stop at our childhood memories…I still dream big now, even bigger than ever before…:)

dream big

What are the reasons we stop dreaming?

The main reason is YOU. YOU stop yourself from dreaming big and achieving your goals. You allow yourself to be conditioned by the environment, people’s negativity and skepticism. Your self-limiting beliefs and your doubts interfere with your ability to dream the life you really want. Remember that you are destroying the inspiration needed to motivate yourself and take action towards your goals. Your dreams are your BIG WHY that will support you during the bad times. So, don’t be scared to DREAM big as it is your fuel to take action. Sometimes you will need to change your dreams and aspirations but never stop dreaming.:)

never let go of your dream

So, who would want to have scary dreams?

Probably not many people. When we say, if your dreams don’t scare you, they’re not big enough… we are not talking about the kind of fear you feel watching a horror film, we are talking about the fear that exists outside your comfort zone, the place where you need to get comfortable being uncomfortable. Stepping into the unknown and overcoming your fears is what really makes us grow; it starts with an idea, a dream… so don’t let your fears stop you from thinking big because you would be surprised by what you can accomplish. :)

always dreambig

I personally define myself as a BIG BIG DREAMER. When I was a young child my biggest dream was to live in London and become a teacher. That dream was my motivation for everything I did. It was the reason I went to language school to learn to speak English fluently; I wanted to learn as much as possible so I could pass on my knowledge to others in the future. I had to make sacrifices along the way but nearly 15 years later I finally accomplished my dreams. The effort and sacrifice required will be proportionate to the greatness of your dreams but don’t be scared to DREAM BIG as sacrifice and pain are only temporary; remember my article NO PAIN NO GAINI can assure you that your rewards will be far greater than the effort needed to produce permanent results. For these very reasons, I will never stop DREAMING BIG. :)

reward worth the sacrifice

However, DREAMING BIG is not enough. You have probably noticed that dreaming by itself doesn’t produce results. You may know from previous posts my motto ‘ACTION speaks louder than words.‘ :)

To simplify the action process, you need to follow these 4 steps to fulfill your big DREAMS:

STEP 1: DREAMING big

Where do you want to be in a month, a year? Then ask yourself, is it big enough?

This is the beginning of your journey. It’s your vision that keeps you on track, fuelling your desire to reach your goals. I use a vision board to continually remind myself of my BIG DREAMS. If you don’t dream BIG with a clear vision, it will be a struggle and you will get stuck in a rut. Think about a car, when you switch on the engine it doesn’t move unless you take further actions. It is the same for accomplishing your big DREAMS. :)

Always shoot for the moon. Even if you miss, you will land among the stars.‘ – Les Brown

If you do something, do it well, put all your efforts into it to accomplish your BIG DREAM.:)

dream big 2

STEP 2: Have an action plan

An action plan is fundamental to your success, it will keep your mind focused on the steps you will need to take so that you are alert and can seize every opportunity presented to you. Great ideas without correct application are almost certain to fail. An action plan will provide you with a solid structure for achieving your big DREAMS:)

dream into action plan

STEP 3: Remove distractions by focusing on your big DREAMS

You might think this is obvious, however, when coaching my clients I have noticed the main factor that delays them in achieving their goals is distraction. You have to fight against your own self-sabotage in the form of self-limiting beliefs, doubts and negativity and you need to protect yourself from negative people and their opinions.

What do I mean by protect yourself?

Firstly, protect yourself from negative people who might tell you: ‘your big DREAM is impossible’, ‘it can never be achieved’, ‘you are crazy to think so big’, ‘keep your feet on the ground’. Believe me, I have heard it all. Mandela wisely said: ‘It always seems impossible until it’s done.’ :)

Mandela it's seems impossible until is done

Secondly, protect yourself from other people’s opinions. We live in an era of mass information; there is so much personal and often contradictory opinion out there on how to ‘do this and that’. If you’re not cautious you could become confused and lose clarity on your own goals because you’re trying to figure out whose opinion is right.

A truly unbeaten strategy is to model yourself on successful people and duplicate their results however what is necessary to understand is that you can only do this if your personality aligns with their processes and formulas. Remember you already have the necessary tools, do not underestimate the power within yourself to achieve your goals, you can read my last blog about how to create your own personal success formula for achieving your big DREAMS. :)

dream focus

STEP 4: Commitment & Precise Execution

Commit yourself 110% when DREAMING big

Until you accept the responsibilities of the word ‘commitment’, you are going to waste much time and energy. Life is short and precious and the sooner we get serious and committed about our lives and businesses, the better off and the happier we will be. So commit yourself to achieving your goals and reap the results of success!  ‘Anything and anyone worth succeeding with are worth committing to. ‘– Adrian Pantonial

Have you honestly made the decision to get serious about your life and your business, to stop blaming others and to finally becoming the best successful person you can be?’

This is a simple ‘Yes or No’ answer! It should also be clearly demonstrated by your actions, as behaviours never lie! ‘Commitment is what transforms a promise into reality.’ – Abraham Lincoln

commitment 5

So what is your answer?  

You will become successful in your life and in your business only when you seriously decide to be successful! Until you have done this, you will not have any hopes of achieving your success. You will need to have the commitment to keep going! When the tough get tougher, keep going!– W. Churchill

How do you know when you are really committed to getting results?

How are they demonstrated in your daily behaviour?

You see, one thing about successful people who dream big, it’s that at some point in their life, each one of them has looked themselves in the mirror and decided that ‘enough was enough.’ They were done playing games, settling for crumbs, standing in the back row…while other people that they didn’t perceive as courageous or as ambitious, were living in a better home and enjoying a better quality of life than them. It was in that moment that they decided to get serious and commit to being the best and the most successful person they could ever be, both in their life and in their business. I can assure you that all the great ones had this conversation with themselves. ‘There’s always a way – if you’re committed. – Tony Robbins

Once you have committed to achieving your big DREAM and your action plan details realistically the steps and time frame needed to get you there; and you are able to disregard negative opinion, you can focus on your execution. This is what will make the difference to your success. This is the step that requires more focus, time and hard work because the preciseness of your execution will determine the quality of your results. Great companies, lives and families are built on superior execution skills. The better you execute, the better you perform and the bigger the DREAMS you can take on. :) Simple as that!

Be reassured and encouraged that a small step closer is better than standing still, you’ll be amazed how far you can get. :)

dream big and take action

KEEP IN MIND:

NEVER ALLOW ANYONE TO DETERMINE YOUR VALUE!  

FIND 10 REASONS IN YOUR LIFE TO DREAM & PLAY BIG

NEVER EVER QUIT ON YOUR BIGGEST DREAMS

dream big aim 4 the star

All of us can create BIG DREAMS, so ask yourself:

If not YOU, who?

If not NOW, when?

Remember, to DREAM BIG is a matter of CHOICE, to REACH your dream is a matter of DISCIPLINE.

dream big matter of cjhoice

This is the right time of the year to start DREAMING big and remember that if your dreams don’t scare you, they are not BIG enough! :)

dream big live your life

To your BIG and beautiful DREAMS!  :)

Viv :)

Double Winner Awards Author of ‘The book on Success

www.vivoliver.com

My personal note: THANK YOU :-)

Hello to one & all :)

2013 has drawn to a close and another amazing and joyful year to look forward to will begin. :)

What about 2013?

What did we achieve in 2013?

Before DREAMING BIG for 2014, I believe that we have to look back to 2013 to celebrate our successes and learn from our mistakes to be better equipped for a optimistic and happy 2014.

Celebrate yr success

Celebrating our success is something most people are not good at, instead people happily share their failures, as if they are afraid that people will think they’re crazy for being successful.

Just remember like most things in life, success goes in cycles. :)

Many people ask: ‘How long does it take to become successful quickly?

Sir Sugar once said: ‘It takes 10 years to get rich quickly…you need to both learn how to do it and then ride at least one cycle…Are you ready for the next cycle?...

SirAlanSugar 1

It’s true there is no overnight get rich quick formula, our success is based on determination, perseverance, positivity, consistency, tenacity, passion and hard work just to mention a few. :)

Take the time to list on a notebook your accomplishments, I am sure, like me, that you will be surprised of many goals you have achieved in 2013, and whatever you have achieved in 2013, tiny or huge, give yourself a pat on the back and a standing ovation! WELL DONE! :)

 well done

What did we set out to achieve in 2013 that we haven’t achieved YET?

List what you still have to achieve. You need to write them down and acknowledge them but remember to focus on the word YET, because you can still achieve goals, if you really wish to. :)

What is the difference that makes the difference to your answers above?

What are your PERSONAL rules for success?

Jot them down and once you have listed them, stick to them, then you know what you need to do accomplish your goals for 2014. :)

Whilst doing this exercise with my coach, he introduced me to a new formula called ‘Physical creation‘. Everything is created twice: firstly, in our mind and secondly in physical form.

This is the formula:

Physical creation: FUNC (Energy, Clarity & Time)

These are the four obtainable results:

↑ Energy ↑ Clarity ↓ Time to create what you wish

↓ Energy ↓ Clarity ↑ Time to create what you wish

↓ Energy ↑ Clarity ↑ Time to create what you wish

↑ Energy ↓ Clarity ↑ Time to create what you wish

The time involved to accomplish your goal on the last three results depends on how long you will take to align your energy and clarity on what you wish to achieve.  Remember that time is our most precious commodity and time lost cannot be regained!

time lost cannot be regained

I guess if you are like me, you need a little more explanation :)

Physical creation is the function of energy, clarity and time.

When you have energy and clarity about what you wish to accomplish, you employ less time to achieve it. I invite you to test this theory by thinking about a past accomplished goal. Before obtaining it, you had energy and clarity about what you wished to achieve. How long did it take you?

Then think of a time when you had energy but no clarity or clarity but no energy about what you wished to accomplish. You would have spent a considerable amount of time in obtaining your goal. Only when your energy and your clarity were aligned with what you wished to achieve did you finally reach your goal. I also invite you to test this theory by thinking about a past goal when you had neither energy nor clarity. How long did it take you to achieve it?

Now that we have understood the ‘Physical creation’ formula, we have celebrated our successes of 2013 and discovered our personal success formula to achieve our goals, :) we might ask these questions: 

How are you going to approach this coming year 2014?

Are your goals set?

Are your plans in place?

Are you committed to seeing them through to the end?

THE FACT IS…

It’s irresponsible to start 2014 unfocused, unprepared, and uncommitted.

Yet, that is going to be the reality for far too many people. Ensure that it’s not going to be that way for you.

Be mindful, a big challenging goal has limited value if it’s not achieved, and expecting to get better results in the New Year from the same old behaviour will only succeed in perpetuating your current situation. It will NOT get you to another level of performance.

Great companies, lives, and families are built around superior execution skills. The better you execute, the better you perform, and the bigger the challenges you can take on. It’s that simple.:)

If your 2014 plans include achieving some BIG GOALS, then you must decide that what you want is bigger and far more important than any fear which prevents you from achieving it.

let yoru dreams be bigger than yiur fears

Fear is never a reason for not starting or quitting. It’s only an excuse for those unwilling to face their doubts, insecurities, and mental demons.

Therefore, your first duty in rising to meet the demands of a challenging goal is to conquer the fear and the mental resistance it brings along with it.

Before 2014 begins, you must shine a flashlight on your character and inspect yourself for will, courage and grit. You will need these to achieve your goals.

You must decide right NOW, that you are going to put fear behind you, that you are going to stare it down, and walk straight through it, advancing toward the goals you want with confidence, conviction, and certainty.:)

action will

Perseverance is ultimately a physical, emotional, and spiritual demonstration of how badly you want to succeed.:)

As it should be, it’s constantly fueled by a heart-pounding, ego-bashing, soul-searching test of your limits. :)

So let them see you sweat, as YOU express your greatness not by the acts you perform, not by the goals you achieve, but by the gritty perseverance that made those acts possible.

If you passionately believe that you are up to the challenge and committed to seeing your goals achieved in 2014, it is your right and responsibility to cultivate an unbeatable mindset and persevere until the end. :)

Some of the two most powerful words in English are ‘LET US’, it’s about collective success. It is how we are going to become more successful by inspiring each other to succeed.:)

everything in life up

LET US make 2014 our best year yet! :)

2014 best year yet

Before you make your goals for 2014, watch this INCREDIBLE MOTIVATIONAL VIDEO.

Even though, 2013 has been a very tough year for me, the toughest one so far, I can only describe it as a rapid roller coaster of emotions and pain accompanied with a lot of success but even more failures and plagued with health issues where along the way, I met some remarkable people but lost a few too, one of whom sculpted and affected my life with his priceless lessons. I will never forget you and your lessons. :)

However, the highlights of 2013 have been immeasurable such as running my Marathon, my Health & Fitness qualifications, writing this blog thanks to all your feedback, notes, comments, emails, suggestions to incentivise me to write every month and travelling to four different continents for my book launch ‘The Book on Success’ winning two Author awards ‘The Winning Mindset Award’ & ‘The Success Steward Award’. I visited some wonderful places, embarked in new challenging adventures, discovered  and appreciated new cultures and histories, tasted so many different dishes and learnt many useful skills but the cherry on the cake was meeting all the amazing talented individuals along the way and the happy and unforgettable moments, laughs, jokes and smiles we shared.:):)

the-happiest-people-dont-have-the-best-of-everything

I never could have accomplished those things without being ready to make mistakes, ruffle some feathers, or ‘falling’. I can assure you, day after day, I have experienced countless failures but I have employed them as springboards to strengthen my character and achieve my ultimate goals because I never gave up. As Mandela wisely said:

mandela great leaders

 So, I ask you:

 What fall did you experience this year?

 Ensure you learn from it while celebrating your SUCCESS! :)

I want to conclude this year by thanking every single person that has accompanied me on my journey because I would not be who I am today and my life would not have been so enriched as it is now. It does not matter if it has been a short or long part of my journey, what matters is that you have been part of it and you have taught me some life priceless lessons that I will never forget. :)

TO YOU, all my dear friends, family, coaches, mentors, trainers, readers, mentees, business partners, colleagues and acquaintances…to every single person that has touched and enriched my life, especially my dear, amazing and phenomenal Bro with his very wise motto and post blog ‘Health before Wealth‘, this article is a tribute and a dedication to YOU:):):)

VIV 2013

‘Sometimes people come into your life and you know right away that they were meant to be there, to serve some sort of purpose, teach you a lesson, or to help you figure out who you are or who you want to become. You never know who these people may be, but when you lock eyes with them, you know at that very moment they will affect your life in some profound way!’ – Viv

Thank you, to all of you, with all my heart for being part of my life! :)

Viv:)

Double Winner Awards Author of ‘The book on Success

www.vivoliver.com

7 Lessons from Albert Einstein’s School of Hard Knocks

Hello to all my readers, :)

 

Have you ever wondered which school is classified as the best for success? 

What is the real secret of successful people?

Have you ever thought how come most successful people seem to go from one success to another without obstacles?

 

‘The truth that makes men free is for the most part the truth which men prefer not to hear.‘ – Herbert Agar

We often associate certain names with the characteristic of excellence. David Beckham with football, Tim Berners-Lee who invented the World Wide Web and Pablo Picasso with art.

What if you had to name the genius of the 20th century?

Without a doubt, Albert Einstein would be nominated.  :) Why?

Albert-Einstein-simple

Although we know him as one of the smartest men ever born, at school he was average at best. He shunned certain classes for the mediocrity of education and mocked teachers who were irritated by his lack of obedience. His Greek grammar teacher, Joseph Degenhart, achieved immortality in the history books through insisting that ‘nothing would ever become of you.’ Later, when Einstein was told it would be best if he left the school, Degenhart explained, ‘Your presence in the class destroys the respect of the students.’ Disgusted by the rote teaching, Einstein quit high school at the age of fifteen. The rest is history. :)

This man of great scientific feats was also a man of noble heart and uncanny wisdom gained from the school of hard knocks. He often struggled to pay bills until the age of 26 when he wrote three papers that revolutionized our world.

Is it the type of school that defined a person’s charisma and intelligence?

What are Albert Einstein’s 7 lessons from the School of Hard Knocks that characterise  successful people?

Lesson # 1  Invest in the success of others.

albert-einstein-quotes Invest in suc

In his famous essay, ‘The world as I see it’, Albert Einstein wrote: ‘A hundred times every day I remind myself that my inner and outer life are based on the labours of other men, living and dead, and that I must exert myself in order to give in the same measure as I have received and am still receiving…’ :)

Those who succeed in life understand that success comes to those who make the conscious effort every day to give back to their family, friends and the community. When we invest our life energy into ensuring the success of others, our reciprocity encourages our own success. For example through blogging, I have found when I try to uplift others by sharing my experience and knowledge, I too receive positivity and connection from countless people who take the time to visit my blog and to comment on my articles. :)

Lesson # 2  Never stop growing.

Albert_Einstein_Message Never stop growing

‘Education is what remains after one has forgotten everything he learned in school.’- Albert Einstein

Albert Einstein’s dislike for conventional schooling never had any influence on his passion for learning. Throughout his life he passionately explored nature and its vastness to seek answers to mysteries that intrigued his mind. A life of solitude and self-study made him into the eminent scientist we recognise.

In our life we learn by meeting different people, by exploring our ideas to solve the common issues and by relentless desire to improve our way of life. Personally, I have learned many lessons of life after I left the school.

Lesson # 3  Your life is limited by the limits of your thoughts.

AlbertEinstein limited

‘Logic will get you from A to B. Imagination will take you everywhere.’ – Albert Einstein

We are educated to consider life with logic. We learn how to get from A to B with merit but we equally abhor thoughts of charting our own course to get from A to B. We are taught to excel at knowledge that already exists. We are infused with the fear of self-doubt to even consider an alternative path.

History has shown that those who contributed the most to mankind were the ones who defied the accepted knowledge of the masses. They dared to imagine what was considered impossible at the time. For example, the 6th century BC Greek mathematician Pythagoras said that the Earth was round and in the 3rd century BC Greek astronomer Aristarchus said that the Earth revolved around the sun. In both cases their ideas were rejected as preposterous.

‘Life is really simple, but we insist on making it complicated.’
– Confucius

Lesson # 4  Simplify everything you do.

Albert einstein simplify

‘If you can’t explain it simply, you don’t understand it well enough.’ – Albert Einstein

Life is simple and those who succeed definitely master the art of simplicity in everything that they passionately do. Warren Buffet was once asked why he hadn’t invested in Microsoft despite being a close friend of Bill Gates. He answered ‘I don’t invest if I don’t understand the underlying business.’ It’s a simple answer but one that Buffet adheres to and it has served him well. :)

James Michener, in his memoir, The World Is My Home, revealed the secret his work when he wrote: ‘Good writing…consists of trying to use ordinary words to achieve extraordinary results.’ :)

All of our wisdom and knowledge dies a horrible death if we do not possess the deftness of expressing our knowledge in simple words to the rest of the world.

Lesson # 5 Live a simple Life.

Alb einstein live a simple life

In his famous essay, ‘The world as I see it’, Albert Einstein wrote, ‘The trite objects of human efforts — possessions, outward success, luxury — have always seemed to me contemptible.’

One of the myths of our society is that ‘more’ will make us ‘happier’. We invest our life energy to possess lifeless possessions. We are educated to foster consumption with the mantra of – ‘The more, the better.’ We are educated to have a great job. A great job requires luxuries to fulfill our outlandish desire to impress others. Before we realize it, we mortgage our freedom to the possessions that bring more sorrow and inner grief in a vain hope to show off to the masses. A life of happiness and inner peace rests upon the virtue of simplicity.

Seldom do schools teach or promote the value of living a simple life or the value of living within our means. The current subprime mortgage crisis is a wakeup call for all of us. It is madness to accumulate more possessions when we cannot afford them in the vain hope that they will make us happy.  It becomes an endless loop of self-pity. Feeling part of something greater than ourselves and having what we need brings a life of contentment. :)

Lesson # 6  Never quit!

Alb Eins never quit

‘It’s not that I’m so smart, it’s just that I stay with problems longer.’ – Albert Einstein

Our conventional education rewards those who succeed in exhibiting their knowledge of books. Students with the ability to memorise rather than the power of creativity are rewarded for their stupendous bookish knowledge. Our dislike of failure comes from the years of schooling that abhors failure. It’s the fear of failure that limits our thoughts and restricts our imagination. Albert Einstein’s passion for physics and his dislike for conventional schooling allowed him to become the greatest scientist of the 20th century. History has countless examples of people who never ceased to imagine, question and discover what intrigued their minds. Success comes to those in abundance who dare to imagine and find solutions that would benefit mankind. These brave people understand the value of failure to gain knowledge that can lead to the peaks of success. :)

Lesson # 7  We are creatures of our values and character.

Alb EIns value and character

‘Try not to become a man of success but rather to become a man of value.’ – Albert Einstein

Every bookstore carries a plethora of books on success and we flock to seminars that promise and sell instant success themes to our insecure minds. Our culture adores instant success to such an extent that thoughts of failure or the fact that achieving your goal will take time, shake even the strongest will. The reality is a far cry from our fake belief. There will be obstacles and failures along the way but we must bounce back from the lows. In today’s world, the ‘get rich quick’ mantra shuns the virtues of value and character. We all know that a man without values and character is doomed to fail miserably in life.

‘I have never looked upon ease and happiness as ends in themselves — this critical basis I call the ideal of a pigsty. The ideals that have lighted my way, and time after time have given me new courage to face life cheerfully, have been Kindness, Beauty, and Truth.’
~Albert Einstein

So, from the school of hard knocks, Albert Einstein taught us to work selflessly for others, to never stop growing our minds, to love our imagination, to make our thoughts simple enough for others to understand, to live a life of simplicity, to never quit no matter what it takes to succeed and above all, live a life of the highest values and character. :)

Albert-Einstein-Quote imagination

Are you a graduate of Einstein’s school of hard knocks?

Remember, success is not a straight line, it has curves, valleys and peaks to climb but at the end, it will be worth it! :)

succeed 1

‘Achieving goals by themselves will never make us happy in the long term; it’s who you will become, as you overcome the obstacles necessary to achieve your goals that can give you the deepest and most long lasting sense of fulfillment.‘ – A. Robbins

alb einst man of value

To your success!

Viv :)

Double Winner Awards Author of ‘The book on Success

www.vivoliver.com

What’s your story? Are you a buyer or a seller?

Hello readers :)

Have you ever felt regret and found excuses for experiences, actions and adventures that you could have made happen and yet you didn’t?

 

What story would you tell your friends, family, children and grandchildren?

 

What story would you write in your autobiography?

1st page of a book

All of us tell stories about ourselves because stories define us and help us connect with each other. Wouldn’t you agree that to know someone well is to know their story? To know the experiences that have shaped them, the lessons that life has taught them and the trials and turning points that have tested them.

life lesson 2

life lesson 1

mindset

When we want someone to know us, we share stories of our childhoods, our families, our school years, our work experiences, our friends, our passions and so on.

Fast forward to December 31st 2013 and think for a moment about the story you are going to tell yourself and repeat numerous times to others.

Will it be a story of…?

MASSIVE SUCCESS and how you made this the best year of your life.

best version of you

REDEMPTION and how you turned your year around.

dont look back

REGRET and how you let so many opportunities slip by.

lost opp

EXCUSES and how tough the economy has been.

excuses

You must accept the reality that by the end of this year, your story will have already been written.

The narrative of your story will be a direct result of your inner dialog and corresponding performance.

performance

The FACTS are simply this: when it comes to the fundamentals of your story, you are either a BUYER or a SELLER.

buyer and seller

If your story is one of REDEMPTION and MASSIVE SUCCESS, then you are a SELLER.

top seller 1

You have sold yourself on the importance of discipline, commitment, and fortitude, and have stayed focused on driving your results in spite of the world of distractions and temptations that circle modern life.

If your story is one of REGRET, EXCUSES and UNDER-PERFORMANCE then you are a BUYER.

buyer

You have bought the same excuses that have led so many others down the pathway of mediocrity and disappointment.

You have bought into procrastination, lack of discipline, the nonsense masqueraded on TV and in newspapers about how bad things are and whatever else is your poison of choice.

To finish the year strong you must become a seller. You must sell yourself on the power of your goals, on your reasons why, and your vision for what is possible.

To be clear: You must begin working on a bigger, better and bolder story! :)

What’s the reason?

Because the CLOCK IS TICKING...less than 100 days remain until the end of this year.

time is ticking

You see, regardless of the nature of their actions, EVERYONE delivers results. :)

If you are currently below target, and your year-to-date performance is not where you know it should be, then you must acknowledge that your existing strategies are not working, and take immediate corrective action to close your performance gaps during these final days. Take courage as I am also experiencing the same, in fact this post is a reflection of how to ensure that I complete my projects on time!

It’s time to shine a flashlight on your soul, acknowledge that your current strategies are NOT working, and wake up to the fact that if you continue along this line of behaviour, the remainder of this year and your future is in serious jeopardy.

The hard fact is that if you are currently under-performing there’s ONLY one reason:

IT IS YOUR OWN FAULT!

Your year-to-date results aren’t dependent upon your background, your company, your spouse, the economy, the latest bestseller on the self-help charts and so on.

Your results ARE dependent upon, one thing…YOU and your ability to deliver, and right now you have NOT delivered the goods.

I would love to share with you these 7 insights:

1. Your results are a REFLECTION of your self-esteem and demonstrate what you believe to be true about yourself and what you are capable of.

2. Your results will NEVER be greater than the vision and beliefs you hold in your mind. Therefore small thoughts and limited beliefs will ONLY deliver small, unimpressive results.

3. Your results SHOWCASE to the world the depth of your commitment, initiative, creativity and passion.

4. Your results SCREAM volumes as to your ability to solve problems or perpetuate pain.

5. Your results TELL the world how you talk about yourself even when no one’s around.

6. Your results INFORM everyone who’s watching what you do or do NOT do every single day.

7. Your results are the NATURAL consequence of your behaviour and BEHAVIOUR NEVER LIES.

The good news is that there is still time to reach your goals, to redeem yourself and most importantly, to finish the year strong. :)

goal

Your ability to finish the year strong is ultimately about character. It’s about turning a flashlight on your soul and examining yourself to find your will, courage and commitment. :)

 character

The final chapter of your 2013 story is waiting to be written…

Is it going to be seen as the sad consequence of neglect, poor character, lack of direction and ambition, or will it be an inspiring example of talent put to good use in the intense pursuit of clearly defined year-end goals?

The 100 Day Challenge countdown of the year has already begun. Each day is important and I trust you will do everything in your power to make sure that every action you take will count towards achieving your goals. You know that every effort is worth it! :)

goal 1

To your successful story! :)

Viv :)

Double Winner Awards Author of ‘The book on Success

www.vivoliver.com

Always go North!

Hello to all my readers :)

Where is your North Star?

What is your mission that points you north?

The one that guides you, serves you and inspires your heart to move forward. :)

North star 1

The North Star has throughout history lead travellers safely through unknown lands and across oceans.

Where your talents and the needs of the world cross lies your calling.’ – Aristotle

We all have great ideas and dreams of what we would love to be and do. :)

Perhaps you dream of travelling to exotic places and living wild adventures. :)

exotic places

wild adventure 3wild adventure

Perhaps you dream of being able to affect other people’s lives in a positive and meaningful way. :)

working for charity angelina_jolie1

9d986__Bill-Gates-charity-Afica

working for charity 2

What happened to those dreams, that sense of excitement, that calling to do more with your life? 

Goals and dreams push us to attempt the unknown and set goals for our future; these goals are your North Star guiding you in the right direction:)

Just as Columbus used the North Star to navigate ships, you too can use your North Star in the direction of your goals and dreams.

You might ask yourself:

What are the reasons why some people follow their North Star?

What are the reasons why some people think differently?

How do you begin to live your dreams and move ahead in the direction of your goals?

Here are the 3 steps you can take to ensure you always go north:

Step 1. Ask yourself challenging questions.

Questions

The clock is ticking and opportunities are lost if you don’t ask enough questions of not only yourself but of those who might know more than you.

Once you have answered these fundamental questions, please set priorities to take action and accept the necessary risks to bring these answers to life:

Who am I?

Why do I exist?

What specifically do I want to do with my life?

What am I trying to accomplish in the years ahead?

What am I prepared to do to achieve it?

When will I begin to follow my North Star?

Step 2. Believe in yourself

quotes-about-life-believe-in-yourself6

jobs believe 2

Right now, in this precise moment, you believe or disbelieve that it is possible to live the life that you want. Which one have you chosen?

Following your North Star requires a fearless and daring spirit along with nerves of steel and a massive amount of confidence. Pursuing your goals will require continuous effort and vigilance to keep yourself on track, but the rewards are many fold. :) You can speak with any successful person and they will confirm it. :)

In order to increase your belief system you need to focus on the main prize and coordinate the sequential steps to get yourself there. As you begin to experience results and therefore improved confidence, your self belief will enable you to take the next step into unknown territory.

One of the greatest life lessons I have learnt is this:

Have faith that what you want, also wants you in return.’ :)

Step 3. Take action and create a sense of Urgency.

Just-Do-It

Remember that you have a finite amount of time on life’s clock to capture the prize that you so desperately want.

Understand that this life time is not a preliminary stage to your real life, therefore you need to get serious, you need to take decisive action and create a sense of urgency in all that you do to achieve your goals. Time is one of the rare things in life that you cannot claim back. Use it wisely and make every second count:)

time is ticking

Whenever you want to figure where your North is, all you have to do is find your North Star.

Remember, North never ever changes!‘ :)

Why not challenge yourself now?

Set your sights and supporting actions on your own personal North Star. Visualise the perfect outcome and never lose sight of it.

This will require dedication, commitment, sacrifice and your willingness of never give up. :)

Everything worth achieving in life is designed to challenge and stretch us because it is only through growing that we become more in order to take on more, I am speaking from personal experience. :)

I want to dedicate a special thanks to my dear bro who inspired me and has been my ‘North Star’ for the past three years.  He has been a real role model and an excellent bro to look up to, I thank you deeply for this, bro! :) I invite you to read one of his last blog which covers the same subject with a slightly different perceptive  ‘Top up your inspiration levels!’  As they say great minds think alike! It is a very inspiring post. Please have a read and let him know as he had a difficult week and today is a very ‘special’ day for him. As the content of his blog is so relevant to life to motivate and inspire you, I feel that it should really be more widely shared. To celebrate his special day, let’s make sure we give it the highest hits of this year! Thank you! :)

I also want to thank all of you who sent me fantastic feedback and really kind notes. I really appreciate it. :)

I truly enjoy sharing my knowledge and experience with you all, if it helps just one of you then that is reward enough. 

As always it would be great to hear about your own plans, ambitions and successes. :)

Credit

To your continuous success.

Viv :)

Double Winner Awards Author of ‘The book on Success

www.vivoliver.com

Confidence through Confluence!

Hello to all my readers :),

Have you ever wanted to speak up about something important but bitten your tongue and kept quiet instead?

Have you ever experienced being shy and feeling uncomfortable in the midst of other people, for example at the gym?

Have you ever been afraid to ask for that raise you very much deserve and have worked hard for?

I am sure you will agree that everybody could do with a bit more of it in one or more aspects of their lives, whether it’s at school, at work, in a relationship or meeting new people. Have you guessed what it is yet?

Yes, I’m talking about CONFIDENCE:)

I have already written about this subject in my previous posts, so feel free to have a read under other perspectives: Becoming Unstoppable! & Becoming Unstoppable Part 2!

confidence 4

I hold the subject of confidence particularly close to my heart as it is something I have always struggled with and therefore I’m constantly working on it. People that may personally know me will find this statement very awkward as I come across as a very confident person. The reality is that I have learnt to manage my feelings very well using techniques which help me with this very aspect. For example, a couple of weeks ago, I had to have my first ‘professional’ meeting with my dear Bro; he is someone who I know very well, a family member, isn’t he?  Oh boy, believe me, I was so uncomfortable and nervous that I had butterflies in my stomach, my heart was beating like crazy, I could not concentrate on anything he was telling me, I kept asking him to repeat himself and it was so embarrassing! I was so uneasy that I wanted to be anywhere else but there talking to him! Crazy, isn’t? The only positive factor was that I managed my state very well and he didn’t notice my discomfort! You see, even when you have to speak to people who you know and get on with very well, it can still feel painful when broaching a difficult discussion and could sometimes even end a fond relationship like in my aforementioned situation. But, you won’t do yourself justice if you don’t speak up and as a result, you and the other person won’t reach a satisfactory resolution and move on. In my case, I did not reach the outcome I wanted, but testing my confidence with my dear Bro in a new environment has been worth the challenge. He tested my mindset by stretching my comfort zone and as a result, it has really allowed the writing of this post to flourish. :-)  ‘The past is always a teacher of the present…Let go of the guilt and rub off the lesson.’ – James Van Praagh

At this point we might ask: What does it mean to be confident?

To start with, we need to understand what we mean by confidence as it will allow us to verify whether we are confident people. The dictionary defines it as “beliefs in oneself and one’s power and abilities”…

Basically, confidence is the difference between feeling unstoppable or scared out of our comfort zone.

confidence 2

Ok, it is clear there are many benefits to being confident, how exactly can we become more confident?

As in my experience, it takes courage to express yourself, explain your side of the story and ask questions. In any situation which is painful or challenging you will feel fear. Fear in life is an absolute given, you will not escape it. Accepting fear as a natural part of your life and as a means to growth is the first step, it’s the decision you make after the acceptance that is the decisive factor. :)

Are you going to let your fears overcome you or are you going to overcome them?

fear 1

In deciding to overcome your fears you have already demonstrated courage which will give you the strength to carry through the actions needed. But it is only after this that your confidence will have grown. You cannot pluck confidence out of thin air, you need to go through the process of fear, courage, strength and action before you can obtain confidence. It’s similar to putting savings in your bank account. Every achievement becomes your social proof (saving), enabling you to gain more confidence (increasing your bank account) which in turn will help you handle the next challenge.

Many of the factors that affect confidence are actually beyond our control. However, we can get the mental edge we need to reach our full potential. :)

confidence experience 1

How can we learn to be more confident?

We may be familiar with what confident friends may say to us: ‘Well, just be confident, mate!’ However, to a person that doesn’t feel that confident, this piece of advice may not be very helpful at all. You know what I am talking about, don’t you?

I have recently been to an event and one subject that kept coming up was that successful people have a boatload of confidence which has been built through the layering of knowledge, experience, competence, expertise, achievement and success. At this point, I remembered what my financial market trader coach, Jit, kept telling me: ‘Confidence through Confluence!’. What did he mean? By layering all the confluent factors in our favour, they provide us with an edge in the financial market. This is exactly what successful people do in all realms of business including trading. :)

The reality is that confidence is just a step below success. The process is simple: when we are confident, we are deciding analytically and not emotionally, therefore we get our desired results. This concept applies even more in the trading world as my fellow traders very well know. To become confident, at first, traders have to focus on the process and not on the prize or capital involved otherwise their emotions will interfere with their objectivity and produce inconsistent unsatisfactory results as well as guaranteed frustration.

Confidence through a confluence of factors, is essential to grow your belief system to provide you with social proof that the task aimed at is achievable. The first example I can think of is related to my passion for trading the financial market and specifically the selection process in choosing a trade. Check out this post Your trading edge to get more insight into this subject.  I have always used a checklist from the very first day I learnt trading and I quickly discovered the power of it. It helped me to make logical decisions, I simply had to ask myself does this trade meet my requirements or not! What factors were listed in my checklist? Well, honestly, I blindly believed my trader coach as he had more experience than me! He listed the factors I needed to look for that enabled me to make confident decisions when the trade met the listed criteria. Most of my confluent factors are cyclicity, price action, horizontal and Fibonacci levels and all these strengthened my confidence…so, you can see the power of confluence. Combine this with discipline and you can almost guarantee your success.  Be disciplined with your discipline! is one of my dear Bro’s posts based on his personal experience. Why do you not check it out and get inspired? :-)

This principle applies in all aspects of life, for example in business, our confidence grows through our business experience, knowledgeable employees, other experts, intuitive and capable coaches and mentors, talented managers and trusted suppliers to name but a few. You see where I’m going with this…Although the difference between everyday life and trading the financial markets is that in everyday life you can fake confidence as in my aforementioned experience but in trading you can’t because the results will speak for themselves. 

The real question is: What are our confluent factors to increase our confidence?

This is a very personal question. Everyone will have different factors that enable their confidence to grow. However, a commonality is that leveraging or utilising confluent factors suggested by more experienced people, such as coaches and mentors will greatly assist you to become more confident and accelerate your journey to success.  :)

confidence 3

To summarise, acquiring confidence is made up of two steps:

Step 1 : The process.

This consists of overcoming fear through courage to gain the strength to carry through an action to achieve a goal. It’s the achievement which builds your confidence.

Step 2: The layering of your confluent factors.

Once you repeat step 1 often enough, a process of compounding your acquired knowledge, experience, competence, expertise, achievement and success, your confidence becomes an intrinsic aspect of your personality. So Confidence through Confluence! Compounding everything! is a post that I warmly invite you to read in order to expand my dear Bro’s insight on the compounding subject (his 8th wonder of the world). :)  

confidence muscle

Even if we’re reasonably assured most of the time, it is beneficial to do a self analysis check up to review and compare our previous achievements to score our confidence levels. It feels good to be confident, which in turn perpetuates further confidence, impresses people and brings you success.  Is this not what everyone wants? :)

Confidence-Level

So, what level is our confidence?

Remember: when you feel confident, you not only feel happier but also more capable and efficient

The quote below is really a reminder to myself as my confidence level will be again tested today with my dear Bro!  :)

You gain strength, courage and confidence by every experience in which you really stop to look fear in the face. You are able to say to yourself, ‘I have lived through this horror. I can take the next thing that comes along.’ You must do the thing you think you cannot do.‘ – Eleanor Roosevelt

To our growth of Confidence through Confluence!

Viv :) xx

Double Winner Awards Author of ‘The book on Success

www.vivoliver.com

Get set to change!

Hello to all my readers :)

What are the benefits of changes for you?

What are the consequences for you of staying the same?

What are the reasons for changes?

change 4 2 reasons

You might know this quote:

change mind

The first step to change starts in our mind, our thought process and our mindset. If we don’t like who we are and where we are in our life, we can change it. Most of the time changes happen because we just wake up one day and decide that we don’t want to feel like that anymore or ever again, so we change just like that! Therefore we should not fear changes, as they are opportunities for development and for personal growth.:) It won’t be easy but it will be worth it.  You will have a few setbacks along the way and this is the time where you have to show your determination and fighting spirit to comeback strongly to be a winner! You need to show bouncebackability! If you really want to know the meaning of this word and how to apply to different aspects of life, then I warmly invite you to read one of my favorite posts of my inspiring dear bro! You are in for a treat, I assure you! :)

change fear

Are you NOW set for change?

A few years ago, I came across the ‘change equation formula’ developed by Richard Beckhard. It helps people to think through issues of individual change and development. It suggests that the majority of people will resist or avoid change because it often brings with it some level of pain or discomfort. In order to help people change, some other factors need to be brought into the process.

Here is the formula:  A+B+C >D

It suggests that for productive change to occur the sum of  A + B + C must exceed the value of D, where:

A = attractive vision of the future. What do I want? How can I clarify my vision – what help do I need?

B = some dissatisfaction with the present. What would I most like to change? What is the basis of the dissatisfaction? If I did change my role, what would I be leaving behind? How important is that to me? Which has the greatest pull – the way things are at present or the way they could be if I change things? How much do I really want to change?

C = some practical first steps. What can I do to move things forward? What resources and networking do I have available?

D = the pain involved in changing. What is the magnitude of the change required? How will I and others be affected by the change?

Consider each Beckhard factor, give the best estimate as to whether each factor is low, medium or high priority and what actions you need to take to increase/decrease its priority. (Sorry Guys, I guess my love for maths is evident in this post! :))

Please answer the above questions for yourself, making notes as you go along and notice the major themes that come through. Use these to design an action plan. You  can visit my website www.thebooksonsuccess.com and download the PDF exercise called ‘The Change Equation Formula’ for a printer-friendly version. When you download this PDF, I’ve made sure that as an extra gift, you discover what leadership skills to use in order to help you with the change process.

Individuals learn and adapt more readily if they have a good enough reason why they should change their behaviours and can see the benefits for themselves, in the short and long term.

It’s not about perfection, it’s about effort. When we bring that effort every single day, transformation happens and change occurs!  :)

change yr thoughts and change ur world

Change is the essence of life and business. It’s a process and it takes time. :)

 change 1

Remember: Don’t ever change just to impress and please someone. Change because it makes you a better person and leads you to a better future. :)

Only when you consistently apply the secret of change in your life, then you discover the real benefits of changing:

change 2

To your successful changes :)

Viv :)  xx

Double Winner Awards Author of ‘The book on Success

www.vivoliver.com

Living without regrets!

Hello to all my readers :),

Have you ever wasted valuable energy and time on the wrong pursuits?

Have you ever experienced unpleasant feelings of regret?

Have you ever thought I wish I did that?

Of all sad words of tongue or pen, the saddest are these: It might have been!‘ – J. G. Whittier

I’m sure that most of us have experienced similar feelings as the poet above referred to things that we regret that we wish we could have done or we did and we would have done it differently, ‘if only’…

Regret is a mental sorrow and a pain of mind at something done or more often something left undone…

All of us have done things we wish we could go back and do differently.

In my coaching, this is one of the most common theme and to what I have recently personally pondered over. I meet people who recon that have done grievous mistakes during their lives, others have not done so bad but they still wonder whether some of their choices in life were really the best. Some of them have been able to overcome the past regrets and continue on with their lives by learning the lessons whilst others are continually plagued with ‘if onlys’ about their past.

Which one are you?

Do you wish that you could live from now on without regrets?

Below are the top 5 regrets of dying. Do they sound familiar?

1. I wish I’d had the courage to live a life true to myself, not the life others expected of me.

2. I wish I didn’t work so hard.

3. I wish I’d had the courage to express my feelings.

4. I wish I had stayed in touch with my friends.

5. I wish that I had let myself be happier.

What can be done about our regrets?

A common people’s reaction is to worry about. To worry continually means to plague, vex or persecute oneself. It causes great anxiety.

worry

Does worrying solve any problems?

Not even one! You know this is an absolute truth!

worry 2 upd

To illustrate, imagine to move forward by rocking for hours in a rocking chair, expending all that energy but getting nowhere! It doesn’t make sense, does it? But this is what we do when we worry about, expending a lot of energy without taking any actions to solve the problem!

Therefore, instead of worry, some positive action on our part may produce good results. :) For example, we can apologize to the person we wronged, perhaps restoring good relations; we can avoid whatever led up to the wrong act, thereby preventing future problems.

worry 1

Then again, we may simply have to live through some situations of life to learn the lessons to benefit from them. But worry is nothing but a form of paralysis that can leave one unable to live fully. The sad reality is that there is no reward for worry!

What are we doing right now, or failing to do, that years from now we will wish we have done or had done differently?

Are we maintaining a course of action that will prevent any possible regrets at a future time? 

Instead of just worrying about such sobering questions, we want to use them to analyze ourselves and ensure that we are giving our best to live our lives to the fullest. :) Otherwise, we could be continuing in a way of life that may result in even more regrets.

Remember, regret comes in all shapes and sizes. Some are small, like when we do a bad thing for a good reason. Some are bigger, like when we let down a friend.

Some of us escape the pain of regret by making the right choice. Some of us have little time for regret because we’re looking forward to the future. :)

Sometimes we have to fight to come to terms with the past and sometimes we bury our regret by promising to change our own ways.

But not for the things we did – but, for the things we didn’t do, things we didn’t say that could have saved someone that we care about,  chances we didn’t take, relationships we were afraid to have and decisions we waited too long to make.

regrets 4

regrets 3

The reality is that in life we do a lot of things, some we wish we had never done, some we wish we could replay a million times in our heads. But they all make us who we are, and in the end they shape every detail about us. If we were to reverse any of them we wouldn’t be the person we are. So just live, make mistakes, have wonderful memories, but never ever second guess who you are, where you have been and most importantly where it is you’re going:)

‘Life can only be understood backwards; but it must be lived forwards.’ – Soren Kierkegaard

As the quote above says, life can be understood by looking back but that it must be lived by looking ahead.  :) So instead of worrying about the past, dwelling on what cannot be undone, stop worrying and stretch forward to what lies ahead. :)  On this very subject, my dear bro wrote a very inspiring article on how having a positive attitude and a strong belief in what you are doing will naturally infiltrate into positive actions which will inevitably move you closer towards your goals. :) Enjoy your reading: Attitude trumps Altitude.

To your living without regrets! :)

Viv :)

Double Winner Awards Author of ‘The book on Success

www.vivoliver.com

Progress: Review it to measure your Success!

Hello to all my readers :),

 

Have you ever asked yourself what is the key to achieve success in the fastest way possible?

 

Have you ever wondered how come most successful people seem to go from one success to another without obstacles?

 

What is the real secret of successful people?

richard-branson-founder-of-virgin-group

If you have ever asked yourself these questions, believe me, you are not alone…I keep hearing the same questions over and over again from my clients, friends, acquaintances, etc. and some time ago, even myself wondered on the same ones. In this article, the final one of the series: 10 Essential Truths to take yourself to the next level, I will cover my truth no. 10 : ‘Review your progress and your success with your Coach!‘  :)

This is a quite hot topic and very common one. You will find a lot of different perspectives to answer the opening questions above and surely they have all valid points as they are drawn from own personal experiences.

 

From my own personal point of view, I have noticed a commonality to successful people both included in my own circle of influence, my clients and reading a lot of biographies of successful people: they regularly review their progress with their Coach!

beckham & coach

You might ask: What are the reasons, surely it must be something more complex than this?

 

As human being, we love complicating matters! If it’s too simple we can’t believe it, isn’t it? I’ve been through this reasoning with nearly every client of mine when shown simple tools and techniques to improve their performances, their skills, overcoming their self-limiting beliefs, etc. and guess what? They all said the same: ‘That is it? Isn’t it too simple? Must be something that I’m missing!’ I spend more time reasoning with them why it’s so simple and it will work then explaining the tools and techniques to use! Crazy, isn’t it? :)

 

Think about this:

 

Who is the best person to plan and train Muhammed Ali to be on the ring or David Beckham to kick the ball on the football pitch?

 

Have you ever heard of a boxer or a football team without a coach?

 

What are the reasons why the best athletes in the world still have coaches if they are already above their competitors?

You might recognise these questions as I have already asked them in one of my previous article but they fit perfectly with these article too! By the reflective questions above, it’s clear that there is a huge difference between reviewing our results by ourselves and with a coach otherwise both Muhammed Ali and David Beckham won’t have any. The reasons?

We can find any justification to take specific course of action and achieving certain results but when we review our progress with a coach, he/she will challenge our reasons and unveil our excuses to make us move forward fasterWe need an external person such as a coach/mentor to analyse and provide us with crucial feedback on our performance to move us forward to our next level. Their input is invaluable to our growth and progress and most of the time they will remind us to go back to the basics, as it is usually these key fundamentals that are completely overlooked. These are not the only benefits. Knowing that someone will check on our results will intensify our commitment and accountability and strengthen our focus and motivation to stick to our plan. If you don’t believe me, you have to experience it! 

Let me ask you one more question:

Who is the person that always gets recognised by the winners during their interviews?

I guess the answer is:

Their coach/mentor, isn’t it?

Rob-Ford-football-coach

This should make you think about how successful people raise their bar of their game to take themselves to the next level. :)

Now, here are the two real questions you need to ask yourself:

Are you coachable and willing to accept constructive feedback?

Are you willing to do what it takes to move yourself to the next level of success?

If the answers of both questions are positive then it doesn’t matter where you are now in your life journey. :)

NOW, it’s the time to step up and raise the bar of your game! To accomplish it, you will need clarity, a set of actions to follow, the right tools, strategies, techniques and especially a coach, a mentor and a team to accelerate your journey to your next level of success! :) On this subject, I also invite to read a very inspiring post from my dear bro entitled: Action, Action, Action! Enjoy your reading and as a result, please take ACTION:)

It’s only by doing things others have not that one can advance.’ – George Patton

 think-outside-the-box1

To your Successes!

Viv :)

Double Winner Awards Author of ‘The book on Success

www.vivoliver.com